Saturday, December 29, 2012

Product Review: Arrive or Crash Airlines

Today I am going to review an airline for those who might be planning to go on a trip.  That airline is Arrive or Crash airlines.  My first comment is that I think it takes guts to be up front with the customers and name your company a name that will tell them the truth so the company gets points with me for being honest.  This company could never be accused of false advertising with their name!  I checked the statistics for this airline, and they get their customers to their destinations about 40% of the time.  Of course, 30% of those get to their destination on the stand-by buses that the airline owns in case their planes won't take off.  The other 60% of flights result in crashes.  However, there are very few customer complaints about those crashes because there usually are no survivors to complain.  Therefore, the airline has a good record in the customer complaint department.

The airline takes great pains to make sure that their customers enjoy superior service on all flights, and that standard is also maintained on their buses.  Nothing is too good for their passengers.  They provide their services at no charge.  Unlike some airlines who charge for food or snacks, they give every passenger water, and they also hand out a complimentary free peanut.  If you should decide to fly Arrive or Crash Airlines, you will be asked to sign a waiver saying you won't hold them responsible if your luggage or your body gets lost before reaching your destination.  If you won't sign a waiver like that, book a flight on another airline because you won't be allowed to fly Arrive or Crash airline. 

Personally, I have no plans to fly this airline largely because I'm a dog, and dogs aren't allowed.  The company knows that dogs have too much sense to fly on their airplanes.

Demon Flash Bandit (Product Reviewer)

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