Sunday, December 30, 2012

Movie Review: Django Unchained

Today I am going to write a movie review of the movie, Django Unchained.  This movie stars Jamie Foxx as Django (pronounced Jango--the D is silent), Christoph Waltz as Dr. King Schultz, and Leonardo DiCaprio as Calvin Candie (owner of the plantation, Candyland).  This movie takes place in the south before the Civil War, and it is a western.   I have to admit that I was a bit diappointed when Candyland was just a stupid plantation and not a place where a dog could find candy growing in the fields, but despite the initial disappointment, it was still a very good movie. Django is a slave who is bought by Dr. King Schultz, a dentist who became a bounty hunter.  I suppose that people probably like bounty hunters more than dentists so it was probably a wise career move.  Imagine spending all that time in school only to have most patients not want to visit your office.  King needed Django because he had 3 people to bring in, but did not know what they looked like, and Django did.  After catching the 3 criminals, Django continued to work with King, and King agreed to help him find his wife.  Django and his wife had attempted to run so both were sold to different plantations which is why there were separated.  I give this movie 4 paws up, a tail wag, and some kisses which would be about a 9 out of 10 on the human movie scale.  I might add that there was a cameo appearance by some dogs, but since the dogs were out to catch a slave, they weren't your typical friendly dogs like myself.  However, they were just doing what their humans told them to do so they aren't really responsible for their unsocialable behavior. 

Demon Flash Bandit (Movie Critic)

Saturday, December 29, 2012

Product Review: Arrive or Crash Airlines

Today I am going to review an airline for those who might be planning to go on a trip.  That airline is Arrive or Crash airlines.  My first comment is that I think it takes guts to be up front with the customers and name your company a name that will tell them the truth so the company gets points with me for being honest.  This company could never be accused of false advertising with their name!  I checked the statistics for this airline, and they get their customers to their destinations about 40% of the time.  Of course, 30% of those get to their destination on the stand-by buses that the airline owns in case their planes won't take off.  The other 60% of flights result in crashes.  However, there are very few customer complaints about those crashes because there usually are no survivors to complain.  Therefore, the airline has a good record in the customer complaint department.

The airline takes great pains to make sure that their customers enjoy superior service on all flights, and that standard is also maintained on their buses.  Nothing is too good for their passengers.  They provide their services at no charge.  Unlike some airlines who charge for food or snacks, they give every passenger water, and they also hand out a complimentary free peanut.  If you should decide to fly Arrive or Crash Airlines, you will be asked to sign a waiver saying you won't hold them responsible if your luggage or your body gets lost before reaching your destination.  If you won't sign a waiver like that, book a flight on another airline because you won't be allowed to fly Arrive or Crash airline. 

Personally, I have no plans to fly this airline largely because I'm a dog, and dogs aren't allowed.  The company knows that dogs have too much sense to fly on their airplanes.

Demon Flash Bandit (Product Reviewer)

Thursday, December 27, 2012

Demon Flash Bandit: He-Dog

One of my human brothers used to be very fond of a television program called He-Man, Masters of the Universe.  He-Man was actually Prince Adam, but when there was trouble on Eternia (the planet on which he lived), he would become a superman type character called He-Man.  I thought I would watch this program and write about it to let my readers know whether it is worth watching.  Although it is not a bad show, I think it would have been better if I had played the part of He-Dog.  Normally, I would be Prince Demon Flash Bandit, a regular, handsome dog who likes to nap and enjoy treats (particularly bacon).  However, when an evil dude like Skeletor comes along (he was the lead villian in the show), I could grab a bone and say, "by the power of dogdom, I have the power.  He-Man used to grab a sword and say, "by the power of Grayskull, I have the power".  Another improvement I would make if I were He-Dog is that He-Man used to ride Battle Cat, and there is no way a dog would ride a cat into battle.  Even though I don't mind cats, I still would not want to ride one into battle.  Cats are just way too unpredictable.  I would also make sure that, when I caught Skeletor, there would be no more problems with him because a skeleton is just a bunch of bones, and all us dogs know what to do with them.  I would chew them into powder, and Skeletor would no longer be bothering anyone on Eternia.  I also think that a dog would have an advantage with Stinkor since we don't tend to to pass judgement on smells.  They are odors, and not good or bad--just fun to sniff.  I might add that I would make  a great He-Dog because we huskies are muscular and I'm also handsome--at least that is what the humans are always telling me.  If the movie studios want to make a He-Dog film, I'm available, but don't expect me to work for regular rawhide bones.  I would demand dingo bones!

Demon Flash Bandit (He-Dog)

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Demon Flash Bandit's Christmas

I hope everyone had a great Christmas.  I got a lot of new toys and treats so I'm a happy dog!  I hope Santa Paws was as good to all the dogs out there.    Angel Zoom Smokey is still annoyed at Santa Paws.  She asked for several million dollars--as usual, and he didn't come through.  I told her he had to give to dogs all over the world.  However,  she said that he is supposed to bring a dog what she wants and that was what she wanted.  She says she was doing him a favor since he didn't have to make her stuff of do any shopping.  Sometimes there is just no reasoning with Angel.  Mother Nature did let us have a white Christmas, but there was only about an inch of snow which is not enough for this Siberian Husky.  However, it was more than my humans wanted.  My Mommy has been known to say that if she never sees another snowflake in her life, she would be happy.  Yeah, I think she is crazy too.  I love snow, ice, and cold.  I have to stop writing now since it is time for my nap.  I have been up for half an hour.  Any dog who thinks like a dog will tell you that a dog needs to nap at least 20 hours a day. 

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Needs a Nap)

Monday, December 24, 2012

Jello Pudding Saves the World

The msn home page has a news item that states that the reason the world did not end on December 21, 2012 as predicted by the Mayan calendar was that Jello left some pudding for the "gods".  I'm not sure just how "scientific" that conclusion happens to be, but I do have to admit that I have to give the humans at Jello credit for having a plan.  Most of the humans just partied and waited for the end to come.  I don't care if it is scientific or not, this dog thinks that it is a plausible conclusion for why the world didn't end.  Most of these ancient gods were used to human sacrifice, and if you ask most of us dogs, the humans don't even taste that good.  Yes, there are a few dogs who have sampled the humans, and the general consensus among those dogs is that humans don't even taste as good as chicken.  However, I have yet to meet a dog who didn't find pudding delicious.  In fact, my humans stayed at a cabin on vacation years ago on Neebish Island in Michigan, and there were porcupines who were trying to get into the cabin because the humans had eaten some pudding and they found it in the garbage and wanted more.  I guess they thought if they were invited inside, that they would be offered more of it.  Perhaps the ancient world would have been a happier place if the humans back then had invented pudding and offered it to the gods as an offering.  I bet the gods would have been in a lot better mood if their tummys were full of pudding instead of human--a practice that has never made much sense to me.  I do hope that they never sacrificed a dog because that would be wrong....terribly wrong. 

Since today is Christmas Eve, I want to wish all my readers a merry Christmas, and a good day for those who don't celebrate Christmas.  This dog can't wait to open my gifts!!!

Demon Flash Bandit (Jello-You Can Never Go Wrong Offering Jello Pudding)

Sunday, December 23, 2012

Christmas Hamburgers Should be Fresh!

Christmas will be here in a couple of days so today I am going to take this opportunity to complain that most restaurants will be closed on Christmas--including McDonalds, Wendys, and Burger King.  All the restaurants that serve the hamburgers that this dog likes to eat will be closed!!  Don't they realize that there are hungry dogs who want a hamburger on Christmas?  I'm sure some of the humans are going to say, "Demon, you can get the burger on Christmas Eve, and put it in the refrigerator and  eat it on Christmas".  Sure, that can be done, but Christmas is supposed to be special with presents and special foods, and just how special is a burger that isn't fresh, but has been microwaved to get it warm?  I know that the employees might want to be home with the family dog, but I'm sure many of them don't have a dog, and staying home would just involve them opening presents, eating, watching television, and sleeping.  I don't think I need to tell you that those are all dog activities, and the humans should be up working and taking care of their dog's every wish.   The only way to keep the humans truly happy is for them to be making a dog happy, and that is scientific fact--I didn't just make it up for my own selfish reasons.

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Wants Fresh Hamburger on Christmas)

Saturday, December 22, 2012

December 21,2012: Not the End of the World

How many of the dogs reading this blog were amused that some of the humans thought that the world was going to end yesterday?  The humans are always such a wonderful source of entertainment for us dogs.  The Mayans were a very advanced civilization, but my assumption was that the calendar would probably start all over again once it reached the last date, just as our modern calendars do each year.   Besides, how do we know that everything was translated properly since they were an ancient people and none of them are around to explain their calendar to us?  However, when some of the humans think that the world is going to end, they do such entertaining things that we dogs don't want to ruin the fun with logic.  I wasn't around when 1999 ended and so many of the humans thought that the computers would go crazy and things would quit working.  We dogs think that machines wouldn't really think about it, but just go on and do what they are supposed to do as always.  Sure, computers are smart, but they can't really think like a dog does.  I have to admit that my humans weren't any fun yesterday because they did not think the world would end.  However,  I did enjoy hearing about the ones who did think it was the end.  It must have been great for the dogs who have those humans.  I bet they were enjoying a great day watching the silly humans act stupid.

Demon Flash Bandit (Enjoying the Silly Human Behavior)

Thursday, December 20, 2012

Movie Review: The Hobbit

I went to see The Hobbit yesterday.  Peter Jackson took a large risk making a movie starring no dogs, and only humans, but the humans were excellent.  Of course, I do think the movie would have been better with dogs instead of humans, but I think everyone knows that already.  This movie is a prequel to the Lord of the Rings movie trilogy.  This movie tells how the dwarves lost their kingdom to a dragon, and they start the quest to return to their home, and get rid of the dragon.  These dwarves are not the usual dwarves that most of us are familiar with--Sleepy, Dopey, Doc, etc., and there are more than 7 of them.  I did not care for the part where the birds were heroes who saved the group from death.  However, don't assume that all birds in the movie are good because that is just not possible when dealing with birds.  You know some evil ones are going to turn up eventually.  Also, I did love the rabbits pulling the wizard.  We sled dogs enjoy seeing other animals do our job, and I am very fond of rabbits since I used to be pals with one who was also a pet around here when I was a puppy.  This movie gets 4 paws up, a tail wag, some kisses, some extra slobbering, and a good sniff.  This would be a 10 out of 10 on the human movie scale.  I recommend this movie as one to see.

Demon Flash Bandit (Movie Critic)

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Justice for Ramses III

Today, in the news, there is an item stating that Ramses III, Egyptian Pharoah  probably of the 20th dynasty (1186 BC-1155 BC) was murdered by having his throat slit.  It is thought that the murder involved a conspiracy in his harem, but the murderers are not being arrested because they have been dead for thousands of years.  I, for one, am glad that this mystery has been solved because I'm sure that Ramses III will rest better knowing that his killers have finally been identified.  In an interview I had with him, he said that the first hundred years of being dead were annoying, but after that, he got used to the idea of being dead and it isn't so bad.  However, I am concerned about the possibility that his killers might be getting off easy just because they are dead.  Still at large:  Brendan Fraser for killing the mummy!  Will he ever be brought to justice for killing the mummy?  I think his film career answers that question.  When Ramses III was asked about his opinion of Brendan Fraser, he said,  "Dudley Doright did wrong."

Demon Flash Bandit (Justice for Ramses III)

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Pirates of the Caribbean: Too Many Birds in Movies

Today I want to discuss the movie, Pirates of the Caribbean.  After 4 have been made, I still see no one in the media wondering why birds hold such important roles in the films.  First, you have the star, Captain Jack SPARROW-  sparrows are birds.  Another main character, Elizabeth SWAN, is also a bird's name since swans are birds.  The only role that should be played by a bird--the pirate's "pet" is played by a monkey.  I think these are excellent movies, but I have to wonder why birds were so important to the movies.  I hope that the names are mere coincidences, but I do think that studios should pay more attention to things like that in the future.  In fact, Hollywood has a lot of actors with bird names so how do we dogs know that it is not a conspiracy to get the humans to like birds?  I am going to list some Hollywood names that involve birds:
Russell CROW, Ethan HAWKE, MARTIN Landau, Dean MARTIN, Steve MARTIN, JAY Leno, MARTIN, Scorsesi, MARTIN Sheen, MARTIN Short, and ROBIN Williams.  Perhaps these bird names do not bother the humans, but we dogs think that the number of "humans" with bird names is excessive, and a dog should be investigating this matter before birds take over the entire world!

Demon Flash Bandit (Warning About Birds)

Monday, December 17, 2012

Swans: Bird Brains

I was watching a television program yesterday, and it said that in ancient Greek mythology, one of the gods (I think it was Zeus), mated with a human woman while he was in the form of a swan.  Wouldn't mating with a god be better than mating with a swan?  Considering that a swan is a bird, I found this statement unbelieveable, and I think Greek mythology is just a bunch of stories the humans came up with to entertain themselves.  However, this dog does not find anything at all entertaining about a human mating with a bird.  Aren't the humans stupid enough already without mixing their DNA with bird brains?

Demon Flash Bandit (Not a Fan of Birds)

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Letter to Santa Paws

Have the dogs reading this written their letters to Santa Paws yet?  If not, you had better get busy writing  because the "Big Dog" is very busy this time of year and you want to make sure he brings you want you want.  I am sharing my letter to Santa Paws in this blog so that, if he doesn't have time to read it personally, he can always read my blog to see what I want.

Dear Santa Paws,
I've been a very good dog this year, and I am sure that you will take that into consideration when you are bringing my Christmas gifts.  I want a lot of dingo bones-maybe a truck load might be enough although I don't think a dog can ever get too many of those tasty rawhide bones.  I want some new toys.  Some McDonalds gift certificates would be nice, but my humans take care of my regular food so that part is optional.  I know you have a lot of dogs for which to bring gifts, so I don't have anymore additional things to ask for.  However, it would be nice if you could do something to keep Angel Zoom Smokey from annoying me.  She is under the mistaken idea that some "dog" things in the house are hers when they are all mine.  I have a few ideas from tranquilizers and mind control to having you put her in your bag to take her back to the North Pole with you.  I do like her, but she has never learned that I'm the lead dog in this family despite me trying to teach her since she was a puppy. 

Thanks in advance for all the great stuff you will bring me!

                  Love,  Demon Flash Bandit

Demon Flash Bandit (My Letter to Santa Paws)

Saturday, December 15, 2012

Searching for Big Paws

A new creature has been evading the scientific community.  This creature has been spotted occasionally, and it is described as a super big dog or, by his scientific name, Big Paws.  This is the dog version of Big Foot.  From the description given by people who have seen him, he is a very large creature who looks like a dog.  I plan to go on a scientific expedition to find Big Paws in the near future.  I have been packing all the necessary equipment for the expedition.  I have procured a recreational vehicle with all the amenities.  You don't expect dog like myself to "rough" (or "ruff) it in the wilderness, do you?  I am used to a certain standard of living.  I have also packed a week's supply of hamburgers so I will have some decent food to eat when I get hungry.  I have a flashlight and a camera in case I run into Big Paws.  I really don't care if I prove to the world he exists or not.  I mainly want to tell him to stay away from my buried bones in my yard.  I take those bones very seriously, as any dog would.

Demon Flash Bandit (Searching for Big Paws)

Friday, December 14, 2012

Dog Archaeologist

I've been working on a major archaeological dig in the back yard of my house.  I am doing this dig as a service to my colleagues in the scientific community.  This research is very important, and is not, as my humans have suggested, just fun for a dog to dig up the yard.  Why are the humans always so shortsighted when it comes to scientific discoveries?  Anyway, I am writing this today to share my latest findings with my readers. 

I have discovered that ancient dinosaur bones are not as tasty as fresh bones, but are still quite chewable.  I would recommend new bones for taste and chew quality, but the old bones can be useful when a dog needs a bone to chew on, and does not have any available.  There is another advantage to a dig, and that is that, if you throw the dirt high enough as you are digging, you can knock a bird out of a tree, and bury it for later digging and eating.  This is not something that has to be done, but it is just an added bonus. 

I also discovered that bones from many of the dinosaurs can last a long time because many of them were big--even bigger than a Great Dane, and Great Danes are big dogs!  This means they ate a lot so the humans who kept them as pets must have had to buy big bags of dinosaur food at the pet store.  This brings me to the final discovery I made....if you are a dog, start digging.  An archaeological dig is educational, interesting, and fun.  A dog can usually kill a couple of birds in the process, and killing birds is a good thing.

Demon Flash Bandit (Archaeologist)

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Don't Trust Birds!

Once upon a time in a kingdom far far away, there lived a family of ducks who ruled the kingdom or duckdom as it was called in their area.  There was the parents and 5 little ducklings.  As with ducks all over the world, these ducks loved to swim--all except for Donny, who was next in line for the crown.  In fact, it wasn't just that he didn't love to swim--he couldn't swim.  The adult ducks tried to teach him, but he was literally afraid of water.  The duck kingdom could not be ruled by a duck who is afraid of water so his parents were very concerned about the fate of the kingdom when they got older and could no longer rule.  Donny decided to run away because he was so humiliated by his fear of water so he took off and lived among some chickens for awhile.  The chickens worked with Donny, and helped him get over his fear of water.  It turned out that he wasn't really afraid of water, but of ruling the duckdom.  Since one of his siblings had agreed to take over in his place, he went back to his family and enjoyed the water like a duck should.  The point of this story is that birds are stupid, and you should not go to chickens for help because they didn't really help him at all since he was afraid of ruling the duckdom and he wasn't really afraid of the water.  Yet the chickens still sent him a bill for services rendered.  This is why you can't trust birds!

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Hates Birds)

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

My Favorite Christmas Song

Yesterday I was listening to a radio station that played that lovely Christmas song, Jingle Bells, which was barked by dogs instead of humans singing.  They said it was the worst holiday song ever made, and I was insulted.  It happens to be this dog's favorite Christmas music, and my humans love it too.  I turned off the station before they could criticize Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer.  What is next?  Are they going to say that "Grandma Will Get Parolled for Christmas"",  or the classic Santa, Please Bring me a New Pickup Truck or a Reasonably Good Used One" are all bad music?  There are some things that one expects in order to have a good holiday season.  Next you'll hear someone suggest that the movie, A Christmas Story, have Ralphie asking for some hankerchiefs for Christmas instead of the Red Ryder  BB Gun that has a compass in the stock and a thing that tells time.  It will sound so lame when his mother says, "no Ralphie, you'll wipe your eye out with that handkerchief.   At least he wouldn't be asking for a tutu and dancing his eyes out...or will he?  Will he ask to wear the rabbit suit to school so all his classmates can see him in it?  Perhaps he would like to have a stick for Christmas so he can poke out his eye out the old fashioned, pre-gun way.  In our politically correct.non-violent society in which children cannot ever fail at anything they do, Santa could give him one of those flowers that shoots water in the practical joke area of the store, and he will drown his eye out with it.  Thus proving that  Ralphie cannot win even in today's modern world.  Of course, that is assuming the tree does not attack him before Christmas even arrives.  Enjoy the holidays and listen to the dogs barking Jingle Bells.  In my opinion, it is the best holiday song ever recorded.

Demon Flash Bandit (Recommending Holiday Music)

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Tennis: The Proper Way to Play The Game

I saw an interesting question posed on today.  The question:  should you tip the groomer?  My answer to that is that you should tip the groomer, and a handy tip is; dogs have sharp teeth. Additionally, most dogs don't want to be bathed.  I think that tip could be a lot more helpful to the groomer than money--and make for less pain for the groomer.  I am only joking because I don't even have a groomer other than my humans.  I also don't tend to bite, but I might if some clown tries to get me wet and put soap on me without my permission...I"m not making any promises.  Sometimes a dog does what he has to do in order to survive and not get bathed.

I was watching a game of tennis on television, and it is a shame that the humans don't know how to play the game properly.  Any dog knows that tennis is a game that requires 2 players.  One throws the ball, and one catches it and  brings the ball back to the original person who threw it.  It is also acceptable not to bring the ball back because a player is also allowed to lay down and chew the ball which is a very popular idea among us dogs.  Wouldn't you know that the stupid humans would take a simple game and do it wrong.  They don't have any sense whatsover!

Demon Flash Bandit (Fan of Tennis Balls)

Monday, December 10, 2012

Treasure in the Yard?

The humans seem to have a tough time understanding why a dog likes to dig in the yard.  Of course, there is the obvious reason that we are trying to make the landscaping look better.  Flat, grass filled yards are boring, and a few holes add that air of distinction to a yard that only a dog can provide.  However, there are more practical reasons for a dog to dig, and that is because from the time we are puppies, all dogs have heard the "tails" of BlackWhiskers, the pirate dog who sailed the seven seas and has buried caches of treasure all over the world.  Yes, treasure chests full of exotic bones from all over the world.  There isn't a dog around who has not dreamed of finding this treasure trove for himself (or herself).  The stories of milkbones, dingo bones, and plush dog toys are hard to resist so we dogs go outside and start digging just in case that treasure is hidden in our own yard.  For humans reading this, the next time your dog digs a hole in the yard, remember, he or she is only looking for buried treasure left by a dog pirate!

Demon Flash Bandit (Looking For Treasure)

Friday, December 7, 2012

Tasteful Holiday Tree Trimming Tips

With Christmas time approaching soon, many humans are decorating their homes for the holiday.  As a public service to my readers, I have searched the Internet for something cool to decorate the tree-something that a dog would appreciate.  I found two lovely ornaments that, if hung from the tree, will show everyone your good taste.  Those items are either Santa Classy Claus or Rude Reindeer.  Both of these feature the butts of those characters, and the butts fart Christmas music.  I bet a dog thought of these two ultra cool ornaments.  Of course, if a dog thought of them, they would want them to smell too because we dogs love interesting and unusual smells.  If the smell makes the humans gag, then that odor will make most dogs happy.  Here is the link so that you can order one or both of these tasteful ornaments for your own tree:

Be sure and tell them Demon Flash Bandit told you about them.  They won't have any idea who I am which makes it funny for me.  I hope everyone who celebrates Christmas, has a lovely tree trimmed with tasteful ornaments like the ones I am writing about today!

Demon Flash Bandit (Tree Decorating Advice)

Thursday, December 6, 2012

Puppy Neglect

A young mom of 4 puppies, Penelope Poodle, of Chicago, Illinois has been arrested and charged with puppy neglect after leaving her puppies with some humans who volunteered to puppysit.  When asked for comment, Penelope said that she had no idea that it was against the law to leave your puppies with a human.  Gary German Shepherd said this happens many times.  The humans appear to be responsible, but most humans are not capable of watching over helpless puppies.  In fact, I've talked to many family dogs who say that the human puppies in the family would have been out of luck had there not been a dog in the family to watch out for them.  All us dogs love our humans, but let's face it, humans aren't even as smart as a cat, yes, you heard me--a CAT.  I am assured that Penelope, who happens to be a good Mommy dog, will soon be reunited with her puppies, but she has to attend puppy parenting classes first.  I hope that, in the future, more dogs will be careful not to leave their puppies with the humans.  Some puppies have even been sold when the Mommy dog isn't there to stop the sale!  REmember, if you have puppies leave them in the capable paws of a dog!

Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing a Puppy Neglect Case)

Tuesday, December 4, 2012


Once upon a time, there were 3 bears who lived in a little cottage in the forest.  There was the Papa Bear who ate the big A&W hamburger called Papaburger.  Mama Bear enjoyed the Mamaburger. and there was the little burger for the Baby Bear.  One day while they were eating at the restaurant, a very handsome Siberian Husky came into the establishment, and, while they were occupied getting drinks, he ate the papaburger, the mamaburger, and the babyburger.  He decided that all the burgers were delicious so he approached the management about making a dogburger which is even bigger than the papaburger.  A&W did so, and now they are the best selling hamburger chain in the United States because all the dogs eat there.  In case you are wondering what happened to the bears, they got replacement burgers from the management since Demon Flash Bandit gave them such a good money making idea.  I think Demon should get to eat there free forever.

Demon Flash Bandit (Burger Expert)

Monday, December 3, 2012

Royal Baby

It was pleasant to see in the news that my pal, The Queen Lady, is going to have a new great-grandchild who will be third in line to the throne.  I am very excited for my friend, and I want to share the letter from me that I am sending to congratulate her on the new addition to the family.  Personally, I think the country would be better off if a dog were in line to the throne, but we dogs know that the humans are trying, and they just don't have the natural intelligence and leadership qualities possessed by the average dog!

Dear Queen Lady,

I would like to congratulate you on the new addition to your family that will be arriving during the next year.  Since you have dogs, I'm sure the baby will be in capable paws because you can always consult with the dogs on how to properly take care of the baby.  If you need my advice or help, you know where you can reach me.  I, as always, await  hearing from you, and hope that everyone in your family is healthy.  I'm sure the dogs are very excited because, from what I have been told by dogs who have small children in their families, babies are very messy eaters which gives a dog the chance to score a lot of tasty human food.  I look forward to visiting you and the baby so I can enjoy some snacks too-and get the chance to visit with you, my friend.
                Love,  Demon Flash Bandit

I hope my readers enjoy reading my letter to the Queen Lady.

Demon Flash Bandit (Letter to Queen Lady)

Sunday, December 2, 2012

Meet a Vampire

With the Twilight movie saga coming to an end, it is quite a lucky coicidence that, according to some news sources, Serbia has a vampire running loose in a village there.  This gives so many young girls who have been dreaming of finding the "vampire" of their dreams, the chance to go there and meet one in person.  Personally, I will be staying home because I have no desire to meet a vampire.  I don't quite see the allure of the vampire, but for those who do, this is a good chance to meet one.  For more information, here is the site:

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Does Not Like Vampires)

Saturday, December 1, 2012

Twinkie the Kid or Twinkie the Dog?

Now that Hostess Bakery is officially out of business and selling their assets, what is going to happen to Twinkie the Kid?  I'm sure I'm not the only dog who is worried about him. Will the people that buy the "names" get Twinkie the Kid with the deal?  If so, will they be wise enough to continue letting him advertise the product or will they get stupid and go with no image or a new image.  I remember when McDonalds switched to their Arch menu years ago, they had Ronald McDonald playing pool and going with a more grown up image.  I guess it didn't work well for them because the Arch menu is long gone.  I hope the new humans have the good sense to keep Twinkie the Kid as he is--unless they go with Twinkie the Dog.  I do think that Twinkie the Dog would be a very popular mascot for the company, and the only one who would be better than Twinkie the Kid.

Demon Flash Bandit (Twinkie the Kid or Twinkie the Dog?)