Thursday, November 25, 2010

The True Story of the First Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving to all my readers. I hope everyone has something to be thankful for this year. I personally am thankful for Burger King and doggy treats and, of course, my humans and my friends.

I watched the Thanksgiving parade from Detroit, Michigan this morning on television, and I enjoyed watching it. I do think the caterpillar they had reading the news was silly. I have met some caterpillars, and they do not impress me as readers. I think they should have had a dog instead. We dogs not only know how to read, but as my blog, and many others prove, we can write too.

The new outdoor Christmas decoration with a husky inside Santa's boot is now ready for display. I can understand why Mommy bought it. Who could resist an adorable husky?

The house is filled with the aroma of turkey even though the humans are ordering the traditional Thanksgiving pizza. This has Angel Zoom Smokey and myself excited because I suspect we will get some turkey for ourselves. We both prefer turkey to pizza.

For those of you who might need to be reminded why the United States celebrates Thanksgiving, I will now quickly recap the history behind the holiday. Many years ago when the Europeans found the new world that the native Americans had discovered many centuries before, they decided to start colonies in this new land. It was rough in the beginning. These hardy pioneers did not have electricity or indoor plumbing. They didn't even have a Burger King drive thru in which to get their food. Thus, the natives felt sorry for them because the natives knew how to survive in the new world. They knew where all the good restaurants and hotels were located, but since they didn't speak the same language, it was hard to communicate, One day the natives took pity on the pioneers and used pictures to invite them to dinner. They ordered pizza from Pizza Hut, and the pioneers were so happy to finally have found a good restaurant that they managed to survive and thrive here in the new world. In fact, it wasn't long before they discovered pizza coupons so their place in the new world was secured. Many years later, Lincoln, who was elected President due to his popularity (he was on the penny so he was a household name), said that there should be a day of thanks for pizza. This is because he was so fond of pizza that it was said that if he couldn't get pizza everyday; he would go into pizza withdrawal. His aides would have to go and find him pizza or he would not be able to function. This was made easier by the car he invented, the Lincoln. I might add that this dog likes Lincolns, and enjoys riding around in luxury. I also like a car big enough that I can stretch my paws out when I'm riding. I know there are some bogus stories of the first Thanksgiving. However, I did some vast research on this subject and was able to find some rare documents in the Library of Congress. My narration is the factual story of the first Thanksgiving. By the way, turkeys were unimportant on that first Thanksgiving just as birds are unimportant now. This dog is fighting the birds' propaganda by relating the truth.

I hope everyone has a nice Thanksgiving, and may everyone's tummies be full at the end of the day. Enjoy the traditional pizza!

Demon Flash Bandit (Historian)

1 comment:

  1. We khan always khount on woo to tell how it REALLY happened!

    Happy Pizza AND Turkey Day!