Friday, March 26, 2010

Cars: Should a Dog Drive Them or Eat Them?

I am pleased to announce that Winston, the dog who tried to eat the police car in Chattanooga, Tennessee is not going to be put to death. He does have to go to school. I wonder--is the school going to teach him not to eat police cars or to eat them and not get caught? I suppose it depends on who is running the school--humans or dogs. I think he thought the car was an over sized chew toy. He probably thought he had won the chew toy jackpot! Since the car was there to catch speeders, I am wondering if Winston has been driving around and perhaps he got a ticket for speeding and he was still mad so he went after the car.

I personally have wanted to drive since I was a puppy. I think I would be a better driver than at least 40% of the humans that are on the road, and one advantage with me is that I won't be chatting on a cell phone since I don't have one. Cell phones are just one more luxury that most of us dogs are denied. You would think they would make an exception for dogs like Underdog since sometimes a super dog is needed in a hurry, but I bet even Underdog doesn't have a cell phone. Anyway, just because I think dogs can drive a car, cats should never be allowed to drive. Since cats have 9 lives, they take too many chances and are very bad drivers.

As you might have guessed, Underdog is a big hero of mine. Very much like Superman, Underdog has a secret identity of Shoeshine Boy until trouble rears its ugly head when he becomes Underdog. He is always watching out for his girlfriend, Polly Purebred. I suppose he will have to be protecting her from the folks at PETA since they have been on a crusade against pure bred dogs which means that they are probably acting on the whims of Simon Bar Sinister or Riff Raff. You can just tell from their names that they are villains. By the way, I have yet to meet a dog who really cares if another dog is a pure breed dog or not. If you happen to be in a precarious situation and you hear the words, "there's no need to fear, Underdog is here". You will know that you will be okay.

I might add that Mommy was watching the fourth season of My Name is Earl last night, and it reminded this dog that the executives who cancelled the show are the same idiots who got rid of Conan and put Leno back on the Tonight Show. How do those network executives get those jobs anyway? If I were in charge, they would be on the unemployment line. Several episodes of the season did have some dogs on them so for you dogs out there, those episodes in particular are worth watching.

It is time for me to mush off the computer. I hope all my readers have a wonderful weekend.

Demon Flash Bandit (Cars: More Than Something In Which To Ride)

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