Thursday, June 2, 2011

Dreaded Library Gang

There are pink bows around the streetlights in my town, Howell, Michigan. I'm not sure why they are there so I assume that they are for some super secret reason. Luckily, I am a smart dog who has given the matter a lot of thought (at least 5 minutes), and I have come up with an answer. Ever since my humans moved here is 1995, they have observed the presence of the "library gang". This is a gang of teens and pre-teens who hang out at the library after school until their parents get off from work. As you can imagine, any group of youngsters who are hanging out reading books and doing research make a formidable gang. Townspeople approach the library at their own risk because of their fear of this marauding group of book-readers. In inner cities, gangs mark their "territories" with gang related graffiti. It is only natural that the "library gang" would choose to mark their "territory" with pink bows. I can only imagine what evil the library gang is going to set loose on the town. I hope the town survives. My human brother Jeff says maybe the pink ribbon bows have something to do with breast cancer. Only a human could be so silly. Pink bows are festive and happy, and cancer is not something to be happy about having. It would make no sense for the bows to have any connection to cancer. I bet that is just what the library gang is hoping the humans will think. Thank goodness for us dogs who have the ability to think things through intelligently.

Demon Flash Bandit (Explaining Town's Bows)

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