Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Doggy Bags are a Good Thing

When humans are involved in anything, I expect stupidity--all us dogs do. Many times we find it amusing. However, when I saw an article on WalletPop today that says the "food police" bust chain restaurants for serving too much food, then a dog realizes that some of the humans are not only stupid, but probably insane as well. Yes, many of the humans are too fat. Yes, many of them don't get enough exercise. Yes, some of them have lousy metabolisms, but what agency felt the need to hire the "food police"? No one is forcing the humans to eat at these restaurants, and there are humans who can't eat the whole thing so they take it home and eat the rest of it another day. There are also plenty of humans who ask for a doggy bag and they bring the extra food home to share with us dogs. We dogs love it when the humans bring home food for us, and we don't need some silly food police humans messing up a perfect system. In fact, we dogs know that bringing home food for the dog is called VALUE. A restaurant that charges a small fortune to give you 4 peas and 2 cucumber slices may insure you stay slim, but why pay them so that you can starve? No one is forcing any of the humans to eat at any of the restaurants, and do you really think that if a human likes to eat, they won't eat oversize portions at home? This is why I want to know who is wasting money hiring these food police. When they bust a restaurant, do they actually arrest the owner or do they just yap about how horrible it is that they serve so much food to the other humans on the Internet? This defeats the whole purpose since the humans who like to eat will then remember that restaurant chain so that they can eat there the next time they go out. I think the humans have a real problem with trying to control everyone else. Meanwhile some of the slimmer humans pitching the hissy fits about the overweight humans are doing other unhealthy things themselves. I think the humans can learn many lessons from us dogs. One of them is that as long as a dog has delicious food to eat, he doesn't really care if the neighbor's dog is eating too much or not. He is busy minding his own business, which is something that would benefit the humans greatly. Too many of them are so busy trying to run everyone else's business that they seem to forget that they have problems too. I have a message for you food police humans, dogs have formed a group that is going to go after your hides. Leave the portions alone and get yourself a dog so that you can bring a doggy bag home to him or her. Hang up your badge.....the dogs are taking over.

Demon Flash Bandit (Don't Mess With My Doggy Bag)

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