When the humans want a toy, they can always go to the big toy retailer like Toys R Us, but where do dogs go to get toys? Sure, there are plenty of stores that carry dog toys, but none that actually specialize in dog toys--at least no big mega-chain. Therefore, this dog thinks that there should be a new company: Dog Toys R Us. What if I want a limited edition collectible Uggie action figure from the movie, The Artist. None of the regular stores with a couple of aisles dedicated to dog toys would carry this. They have balls, bones, and squeaky toys, but what about those discriminating dogs who want to collect toys to decorate our houses? Where can we get those toys? In fact, since I'm a world famous blogger, you would think that there would be a Demon Flash Bandit action husky, but there is not. I know--I'm as shocked as my readers that I have not been approached with a contract to make my action husky figure. I think dog action figures would even be popular with the humans. Most humans like dogs, and we make the humans feel good so it seems to me that dog action figures are an idea whose time has come. For any of you big companies reading this blog, be sure and contact me. I am sure my action figure would be very popular (or pupular as us dogs put it).
Demon Flash Bandit (Wants Dog Action Figures)
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
Zombies in the News
I have written several blogs dealing with zombies and today I see that there was a zombie attack in Miami, Florida. A naked man was biting the face off of another man, and he would not stop until a policeman shot and killed him. Since a zombie is an "undead" human who goes around eating other humans, this man fulfills the definition of a zombie. Here is the link so you can read about it for yourself:
http://www.examiner.com/article/police-shoot-naked-cannibal-during-zombie-attack-miami
This brings up another subject that I have mentioned in a past blog: zombie insurance. I'm sure most of my readers laughed at the idea, but now I bet it doesn't seem quite so funny, does it? I doubt that regular insurance covers zombie attacks so, having special zombie insurance makes a lot more sense now that there is a zombie attack in the news. Sure, it is still unlikely that most people will be attacked by a zombie, but how many want to take that risk? For those who want to be safe, here is the link for zombie insurance. Tell them Demon Flash Bandit sent you....I love saying that.
http://zaico.com/
I hope everyone had a nice weekend, and I hope you don't run into any zombies!
Demon Flash Bandit (Reporting Zombies in the News)
http://www.examiner.com/article/police-shoot-naked-cannibal-during-zombie-attack-miami
This brings up another subject that I have mentioned in a past blog: zombie insurance. I'm sure most of my readers laughed at the idea, but now I bet it doesn't seem quite so funny, does it? I doubt that regular insurance covers zombie attacks so, having special zombie insurance makes a lot more sense now that there is a zombie attack in the news. Sure, it is still unlikely that most people will be attacked by a zombie, but how many want to take that risk? For those who want to be safe, here is the link for zombie insurance. Tell them Demon Flash Bandit sent you....I love saying that.
http://zaico.com/
I hope everyone had a nice weekend, and I hope you don't run into any zombies!
Demon Flash Bandit (Reporting Zombies in the News)
Monday, May 28, 2012
Bacon Burger
I can never write too much about the deliciousness of bacon--one of my favorites meats. I also like hamburgers so when I saw this bacon burger on epic meatltime, I had to share it with my readers. Here is the link:
http://now.msn.com/living/0515-epic-bacon-burger.aspx
I would love to sink my teeth into that burger, and I'm sure other dogs would also love to have a bite of it. I think it is time for the humans to make epic mealtime for dogs. We happen to enjoy the kinds of meats they make, and I would be happy to do a guest appearance to eat some of the food they make. I'm sure they would be thrilled to have a celebrity like myself show up to help them eat the food they make. Until that time comes, I will just have to eat the hamburgers Mommy brings me-with or without baccon. I hope everyone is having a good holiday, and I think the best way to honor the sacrifices made by the humans who served their country is to eat a bacon burger! I plan to eat one in honor of my human Daddy who is no longer with us. I know he would want me to have a bacon burger.
Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Loves Bacon Burgers)
http://now.msn.com/living/0515-epic-bacon-burger.aspx
I would love to sink my teeth into that burger, and I'm sure other dogs would also love to have a bite of it. I think it is time for the humans to make epic mealtime for dogs. We happen to enjoy the kinds of meats they make, and I would be happy to do a guest appearance to eat some of the food they make. I'm sure they would be thrilled to have a celebrity like myself show up to help them eat the food they make. Until that time comes, I will just have to eat the hamburgers Mommy brings me-with or without baccon. I hope everyone is having a good holiday, and I think the best way to honor the sacrifices made by the humans who served their country is to eat a bacon burger! I plan to eat one in honor of my human Daddy who is no longer with us. I know he would want me to have a bacon burger.
Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Loves Bacon Burgers)
Labels:
bacon,
bacon burger,
barbequed,
epic,
gator teeth,
hamburgers,
holidays,
mealtime,
meats,
sink
Sunday, May 27, 2012
Dogs: More Talented Than Humans!
An article on aol news today says that scientists have found flutes made from bones that date back 40,000 years. The article states that it shows that humans created a musical instrument farther back than previously thought. For those who want to read the article, here is the link:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/24/bone-flute-music-instruments_n_1544417.html?ref=science
As a dog, I find this article to be highly annoying. First, why did they assume it was a human who made the instrument? Bones are something us dogs spend a lot of time working with, and I think if anyone created a musical instrument from a bone, it would be a dog. As the lead howler of the Howling Huskies, I am insulted that the scientists would automatically assume it is a human who made it. I think a dog made a flute from a bone, and after putting on a show for the other dogs, he sat down and ate the flute. That is what any dog would do with a bone. You can always make another flute from the next bird you kill, and killing birds is something dogs enjoy doing. I suspect that if a human ever played it, he probably stole it from the dogs. In fact, I doubt that he played it as well. Humans never do anything as well as us dogs. The next time you read about some archeaological discovery, remember that, no matter what the scientists say, if it is something intelligent, it was invented by a dog!
Demon Flash Bandit (Dogs: Smarter than Humans)
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/24/bone-flute-music-instruments_n_1544417.html?ref=science
As a dog, I find this article to be highly annoying. First, why did they assume it was a human who made the instrument? Bones are something us dogs spend a lot of time working with, and I think if anyone created a musical instrument from a bone, it would be a dog. As the lead howler of the Howling Huskies, I am insulted that the scientists would automatically assume it is a human who made it. I think a dog made a flute from a bone, and after putting on a show for the other dogs, he sat down and ate the flute. That is what any dog would do with a bone. You can always make another flute from the next bird you kill, and killing birds is something dogs enjoy doing. I suspect that if a human ever played it, he probably stole it from the dogs. In fact, I doubt that he played it as well. Humans never do anything as well as us dogs. The next time you read about some archeaological discovery, remember that, no matter what the scientists say, if it is something intelligent, it was invented by a dog!
Demon Flash Bandit (Dogs: Smarter than Humans)
Saturday, May 26, 2012
Interests and Hobbies
I'm sure many of my readers are wondering what I do in my spare time so I have decided to give you a glimpse of the Demon Flash Bandit lifestyle. My major hobby is napping. I try to work in as many naps everyday as possible. I know it is hard to imagine that I could be even more important than I already am, but in my dreams, I am more important than in my everyday awake life.
Another of my hobbies is to keep Angel Zoom Smokey, the other Siberian husky who lives in the same house with me, in line. If a dog like myself doesn't do it, she will be zooming around acting like a crazy dog. I warned the humans not put Zoom in her name, but as usual, they did not listen.
I also like to lick my paw. It happens to be a very delicious paw, and licking it is fun. I spend some of my time practicing music with the Howling Huskies. I am the lead howler of the group! I also like to eat--preferably hamburgers. I usually find some time during the day to chew on a dingo bone, or a regular rawhide bone if the humans haven't spent the extra money on the dingo brand of rawhide.
I write my diary on www.dogster.com, and then I write my blog and it is time for bed. A dog has to get some sleep between naps!
Demon Flash Bandit (My Interests and Hobbies)
Another of my hobbies is to keep Angel Zoom Smokey, the other Siberian husky who lives in the same house with me, in line. If a dog like myself doesn't do it, she will be zooming around acting like a crazy dog. I warned the humans not put Zoom in her name, but as usual, they did not listen.
I also like to lick my paw. It happens to be a very delicious paw, and licking it is fun. I spend some of my time practicing music with the Howling Huskies. I am the lead howler of the group! I also like to eat--preferably hamburgers. I usually find some time during the day to chew on a dingo bone, or a regular rawhide bone if the humans haven't spent the extra money on the dingo brand of rawhide.
I write my diary on www.dogster.com, and then I write my blog and it is time for bed. A dog has to get some sleep between naps!
Demon Flash Bandit (My Interests and Hobbies)
Friday, May 25, 2012
Aunt Millies Bread: Baked by a Dog!
There is a bakery brand at the supermarket here called Aunt Millies. I wasn't aware I had an Aunt Millie until I read the label on the bread bag. Being a friendly dog, I was pleased to have discovered a new relative in my family. The only thing I don't understand is why Aunt Millie looks human and why is she not baking dog treats? Since I'm a dog, and she is my aunt, she has to be a dog. I don't have any human relatives except for the ones I've adopted. This caused me a bit of frustration until I realized that it is a clever ad campaign. The humans like to think that a human is running the company and baking the bread. They have big egos and think they can do things better than a dog, which is course, is erroneous thinking. However, you have to expect the humans' thinking to be stupid because they don't possess the superior dog brain. I am planning to write Aunt Millie a letter asking that she start baking dog treats. She can keep her pseudo identity because we dogs don't really care whose "photo" is on the packaging...we only care about the treats. I look forward to getting some delicious dog bakery treats from Aunt Millie....I'm sure she will be happy to start baking dog treats too!
Demon Flash Bandit (Aunt Millie's Nephew Dog)
Demon Flash Bandit (Aunt Millie's Nephew Dog)
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Trilogy Movie Review: The Napkins (Series)
Today I am going to do a movie review of 3 movies--The Napkin Trilogy-which have been such a major success at the box office. Everyone wants to see these movies, and who can blame them? They are 3 of the best movies Hollywood has ever made!
Napkins 1: The Clean-Up
Alien space napkins come to Earth to clean the planet. They give up and return to their home planet.
Napkins 2: The Return of the Napkins
After they return home due to the hopelessness of trying to clean Earth, they decide to return to try once again to clean the planet.
Napkins 3: the Final Stand
After 20 years of cleaning the planet, the napkins finally give up completely and return to their home planet, Urcleanus.
I'm not saying that a Napkins 4 is not possible, but I seriously doubt that the studio will want to make another one.
Next time you pick up a napkin to wipe off some food on your face, look closely at that napkin to make sure it isn't a space alien!
I have been given the da Liebster award by my pal and fellow blooger, Whitley Westie. I will be posting more about this in the next day or two--when my computer illerate Mommy finds out how to link stuff. Mommy says that when she was in school, they were taught to type on non-electric typewriters. I don't think any such thing exists so I suspect she is lying to me. You know how the older humans are....we used to have to walk through 20 inches of snow to get to school, and we lived in the tropics. The oldsters sure love to exaggerate all the horror they had to go through as children! I would hire a more computer savvy secretary, but Mommy works free so I can't beat her price.
Demon Flash Bandit (Movie Review: The Napkin Trilogy)
Napkins 1: The Clean-Up
Alien space napkins come to Earth to clean the planet. They give up and return to their home planet.
Napkins 2: The Return of the Napkins
After they return home due to the hopelessness of trying to clean Earth, they decide to return to try once again to clean the planet.
Napkins 3: the Final Stand
After 20 years of cleaning the planet, the napkins finally give up completely and return to their home planet, Urcleanus.
I'm not saying that a Napkins 4 is not possible, but I seriously doubt that the studio will want to make another one.
Next time you pick up a napkin to wipe off some food on your face, look closely at that napkin to make sure it isn't a space alien!
I have been given the da Liebster award by my pal and fellow blooger, Whitley Westie. I will be posting more about this in the next day or two--when my computer illerate Mommy finds out how to link stuff. Mommy says that when she was in school, they were taught to type on non-electric typewriters. I don't think any such thing exists so I suspect she is lying to me. You know how the older humans are....we used to have to walk through 20 inches of snow to get to school, and we lived in the tropics. The oldsters sure love to exaggerate all the horror they had to go through as children! I would hire a more computer savvy secretary, but Mommy works free so I can't beat her price.
Demon Flash Bandit (Movie Review: The Napkin Trilogy)
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Birds Part in Evolution
Some scientists say that birds evolved from dinosaurs. On the other paw, some of the humans think evolution did not happen and some don't think dinosaurs ever existed. I can only imagine life without birds which would be a utopia. However, since birds do exist, if evolution is correct, then birds are some kind of evil hell spawn, and should be killed. I am ready to do my part to rid the world of the evil birds. I just wish the humans would quit helping them by feeding them. The humans should listen to us dogs when we tell them that birds are evil!
Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing Birds)
Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing Birds)
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
Bacon: Not Just for Snacking Anymore!
I was doing some research on the Internet on a topic which I happen to feel is of major importance to dogs everywhere: BACON! I have yet to meet a dog who does not enjoy bacon. It turns out that some street vendors in various parts of the country serve hot dogs wrapped in bacon which is finally a hot dog worth eating. I personally don't care much for hot dogs. I have eaten a bite of them on occasion, but I usually let Angel Zoom Smokey have them. I happen to be a very picky dog! However, I LOVE bacon, and said bacon might even make a hot dog worth trying. Besides, you can always eat the bacon that is wrapped around it and leave the hot dog for another dog. I think they should sell pre-wrapped bacon dogs in the supermarket. Bacon: it's not just for snacking anymore!
Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Loves Bacon)
Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Loves Bacon)
Monday, May 21, 2012
Movie Review: Dark Shadows
After the Michigan ComicCon Saturday, I went to the theatre to see Dark Shadows. Johnny Depp stars as Barnabus Collins in a movie version of a television show from the 70's. Barnabus Collins, a rich and influential man from the 1700's, was turned into a vampire when he did not return the love of a woman who turned out to be a witch. He was chained and buried, and was accidentally dug up in 1972. He returns to his ancestral home (Collinwood) to find the modern day Collins family, and all their problems. The witch who loved him is still around and still wants him to love her, but he loves another. The movie has many funny moments, and it is enjoyable, but I suspect it would have been better had they stuck more to the original Dark Shadows concept. This is why I give it 4 paws up which is about a 7 out of 10 on the human movie scale. It is still very entertaining, and Johnny Depp, as usual, does a great job. I recommend this movie because it is a good way to spend an afternoon or evening.
Demon Flash Bandit (Movie Critic)
Demon Flash Bandit (Movie Critic)
Saturday, May 19, 2012
Demon Flash Bandit at the Michigan ComicCon!
I am a lucky dog. I went to the Michigan ComicCon yesterday. I didn't want to be mobbed by my adoring fans so, since many of the humans dress in costume, I dressed as Superdog; and I was able to enjoy the show just like a regular dog. They had no idea that the famous blogger, Demon Flash Bandit, was among them. William Shatner has done the same thing so I am in good company. I got a couple of pawtographs, and I looked around. The toys they sold there were a bit of a disappointment. With the exception of a few items like a Brian the Dog figure (from the television show, Family Guy), most of the toys weren't interesting. When I look for toys, I'm looking for squeaky toys or balls. I don't want to play with miniature "human" figures. Humans are boring and do boring things so why would I want to play with human figures? What can I do with a human action figure? Let it go to work to make money.....it seems like that is all most of them do with their lives. Since work does not seem to be fun, I have no idea why the humans spend so much time doing it, but I can only assume it is because they aren't dogs. If they were dogs, they would be smart enough to sit at home and nap instead of working.
Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Attended MI ComicCon)
Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Attended MI ComicCon)
Thursday, May 17, 2012
Prehistoric Modern Art
After much searching, I have found prehistoric vomit in a cave in South America. I think this is the earliest version of "modern art" ever discovered. Clearly, this was a piece of art about a bird. Some ancient human thought of a bird, and that thought alone made him vomit. And then voila, ART! I don't think I could have made a better painting myself. Additionally Spot (one of my doggy art students) said the art piece was "yummy". Sadly, because of Spot, I can no longer share my discovery with the world-at least not until Spot has to take the Browns to the Superbowl. However, I will continue to try to "dig" up more ancient art to share with the humans. I think it is important for them to see what kind of art their human ancestors enjoyed.
Demon Flash Bandit (Professor of Dog Art)
Demon Flash Bandit (Professor of Dog Art)
Labels:
ancestors,
art,
delicious,
modern art,
prehistoric,
Professor,
searching,
Superbowl,
vomit,
Yummy
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Dog Artist!
I'm sure many of my readers have contemplated buying some art work to make their homes more beautiful. There are many art subjects, but I have to admit that, in my opinion, the best painting you can add to an art collection is one of a dog. I'm not just saying that because I'm a dog myself, but because seeing a dog hanging on the wall in a painting makes everyone feel good-except maybe the family cat, and who cares what the cat thinks anyway? Whether the dog is sleeping, walking, running, eating, or sitting, the painting will make anyone who looks at it feel happier just for having viewed it. Of course, I have shared some of my own art work on my blog in the past so the next best thing to having art whose subject is a dog is to have art work that is painted by a dog. I want to share a website with my readers where they can purchase dog art. Be sure and tell the site that Demon Flash Bandit sent you. I always love it when my readers do that even though the site has no idea who I am. That is why I think it is funny. Here is the address:
http://www.artfordogs.com/
Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Artist)
http://www.artfordogs.com/
Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Artist)
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Knuckles the Dog in Legal Battle
What happens to the family dog when a couple break up? In the case of Knuckles, a dog from New York City, his human daddy, a man named Dershowitz, has taken the case to court to get Knuckles back from his ex. Knuckles human mommy, moved to California and took the dog with her. So far, Dershowitz has spent $60,000 on legal fees to get Knuckles back. I'm sure some of the humans will think that is crazy, but it makes sense to me. I think us dogs are worth far more than that-and it is nice to see humans who recognize that fact. Of course, the mommy says he is doing it because he is mad that she is getting on with her life. I have no idea what the truth is...that is up to a judge to decide, but I do like the idea of humans caring so much for a dog. That makes us dogs feel good. You can read more about this story at:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/14/dog-custody-battle-60000_n_1514337.html
Demon Flash Bandit (Knuckles the Dog In Legal Fight)
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/14/dog-custody-battle-60000_n_1514337.html
Demon Flash Bandit (Knuckles the Dog In Legal Fight)
Labels:
California,
Dershowitz,
judge,
Knuckles,
legal,
New York City
Monday, May 14, 2012
Diamond Jubilee and Willis Sausage
I was just reading about the Diamond Jubilee that Queen Elizabeth II is celebrating in Great Britain. I know the humans are fond of diamonds, but to have events during the entire year dedicated to a gemstone is something that only the humans could do. Don't get me wrong--I know the humans like shiny things. However, if I were going to celebrate something, I would celebrate meat-particularly bacon! You can't eat a diamond. Okay, some people and dogs have, but diamonds don't taste good and they have no nutritional value. They can even make you sick if they get lodged somewhere.
My humans have been going to nearby Frankenmuth, Michigan for decades, and there is a place there that is a dog's dream come true. It is Willis Sausages, and they sell a lot of different meats. They have a website, and you can order on-line. I am going to share the site for those who might be interested in something different. They even have a potato sausage that they make themselves. I think that has to be very convenient for the humans--meat and potatoes are already together so that you only have to make one thing instead of two. Here is the address:
http://www.willissausages.com/
If you are able to visit there in person, you won't be disappointed. My humans always stop in there when they go to Frankenmuth. Sadly, dogs are not allowed!
Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing Willis Sausage)
My humans have been going to nearby Frankenmuth, Michigan for decades, and there is a place there that is a dog's dream come true. It is Willis Sausages, and they sell a lot of different meats. They have a website, and you can order on-line. I am going to share the site for those who might be interested in something different. They even have a potato sausage that they make themselves. I think that has to be very convenient for the humans--meat and potatoes are already together so that you only have to make one thing instead of two. Here is the address:
http://www.willissausages.com/
If you are able to visit there in person, you won't be disappointed. My humans always stop in there when they go to Frankenmuth. Sadly, dogs are not allowed!
Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing Willis Sausage)
Saturday, May 12, 2012
Doghouse Worthy of Demon Flash Bandit!
I'm a dog who lives inside with my humans, but I was doing some research for my blog today, and I discovered a very cool dog house. Here is the link:
http://www.thecoolist.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/celebrity-hacienda-dog-house.jpg
I wouldn't mind having this dog house in the back yard. Of course, I would not "live" in it full time, but it would be a nice place to hang out when I am in the yard and want to get out of the sun. As you can see, it is a very cool house. I bet it also doesn't have a bathtub like the human's houses have. I have never seen the purpose of having a bathtub. Maybe a doggy pool would be nice, but a pool is something you can swim in or just sit around and enjoy an iced drink. I think this would be a great house for me, and I have no idea why the humans haven't already had it built for me in the yard. I also need a garage for the Demonflashbanditmobile I plan to own. I don't want my car out in the weather because my car is going to be a one of a kind custom car just for me. I am still thinking that the Monkeemobile would be nice as a Demonflashbanditmobile. I have no idea why my humans haven't purchased it for me yet. I am too famous a dog not to travel in style. Now I am riding in the family vehicle, and it is beneath my status as a dog blogger. What if other dogs see me in the family car? What will they think? Even worse, what if a cat sees me...you know how annoying they are!
Demon Flash Bandit (Doghouse Worthy of Me)
http://www.thecoolist.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/celebrity-hacienda-dog-house.jpg
I wouldn't mind having this dog house in the back yard. Of course, I would not "live" in it full time, but it would be a nice place to hang out when I am in the yard and want to get out of the sun. As you can see, it is a very cool house. I bet it also doesn't have a bathtub like the human's houses have. I have never seen the purpose of having a bathtub. Maybe a doggy pool would be nice, but a pool is something you can swim in or just sit around and enjoy an iced drink. I think this would be a great house for me, and I have no idea why the humans haven't already had it built for me in the yard. I also need a garage for the Demonflashbanditmobile I plan to own. I don't want my car out in the weather because my car is going to be a one of a kind custom car just for me. I am still thinking that the Monkeemobile would be nice as a Demonflashbanditmobile. I have no idea why my humans haven't purchased it for me yet. I am too famous a dog not to travel in style. Now I am riding in the family vehicle, and it is beneath my status as a dog blogger. What if other dogs see me in the family car? What will they think? Even worse, what if a cat sees me...you know how annoying they are!
Demon Flash Bandit (Doghouse Worthy of Me)
Friday, May 11, 2012
Sky King Arrests Criminals
It has been a real challenge to decide what to write a blog about today. I could write about Bristol Palin criticizing President Obama for his opinions. However, considering my opinion of Bristol Palin and how she has lived her life, I am going to write about something far more important--Sky King. Sky King was a radio show that became a television show in the early days of television. It is the story of a pilot, and his plane, Songbird, that he used to chase down criminals and bring them to justice. He lived on the Flying Crown Ranch near the ficticious town of Grover, Arizona. Grover may have been a small town, but there were plenty of criminals hanging out there. Judging from all the arrests, you would think that Grover must have the FBI hanging out there all the time because there are so many criminals there. Mommy was watching a dvd of the old show, and I had to watch it too. One episode she watched was great. It starred a dog whose character's name was Barney. He was a seeing eye dog who did a great job as a detective. Sky King had the help of his niece, Penny. As time when on, and she became a better pilot, she got promotions and her name now is Dollar. The episodes I watched were in black and white and I don't think they were filmed in high definition because the pictures weren't that clear. Evidently, the humans' early films were not as advanced as those of today. I guess they didn't have dogs inventing things for them back then and had to depend upon their own minds...and you have to remember a dog's motto: Humans: Can They Get Any Dumber? We never answer this because, quite frankly, we are afraid to answer it.
Demon Flash Bandit (Dog King)
Demon Flash Bandit (Dog King)
Labels:
Arizona,
Barney,
black and white,
Bristol Palin,
criminals,
dollar,
episode,
FBI,
Flying Crown Ranch,
Grover,
high definition,
Penny,
President Obama,
promotions,
seeing eye dog,
Sky King
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Mother's Day Gift for Mommy
Mother's Day is Sunday, May 13, this year. Because my human Mommy treats me so good, I want to make sure I give her something super special to show her how much I love her. This is the lady who feeds me human food, and makes sure I am happy so buying her a gift on Mother's Day is something I look forward to doing. It makes me feel good to show her how much I love her on her special day. Or course, the big problem is, "what does a dog get to show his Mommy that she is loved and special to him?". After giving this subject much thought, I finally decided what to get for her. I am going to give her some dingo bones. I have heard that a gift that you yourself like is often the best thing to get for the recipient, and I am very fond of dingo bones. I asked Angel Zoom Smokey for her opinion and she agrees. She said that she is always happy to get a new dingo bone to chew on. When Mommy is sitting around chewing on her delicious dingo bone, she will remember the wonderful dog who gave it to her!!! Happy Mother's Day to all the Moms out there on the Internet!
Demon Flash Bandit (Choosing a Mother's Day Gift)
Demon Flash Bandit (Choosing a Mother's Day Gift)
Labels:
agrees,
chewing,
dingo bones,
Mommy,
Mother's Day,
opinions,
remember,
Sunday,
wonderful
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
Movie Review: The Avengers (also titled Avengers Assembled)
I have been to the theatre to see the movie, The Avengers (also called Avengers Assembled in other countries). It is time for me to do a movie review for my readers who depend on me to let them know which movies are good and which aren't. When Loki, Thor's annoying brother from Asgard, decides to take over and rule Earth, Nick Fury gets his group of super heroes together to thwart Loki's evil plans. (I hope in a sequel, they will go after birds--I'll have to bark at them about that.) The superheroes are Ironmen, Thor, the Hulk, Black Widow, Captain America, and Hawkeye The superheroes do not always work together as those of you who have seen Ironman already know. He does not "work and play well with others". However, eventually, they do work together, and you will have to go to see the movie to find out whether they were successful or not since I can't divulge the end of the movie for those who haven't seen it yet. I give this movie 4 paws up, a tail wag, some doggy kisses, and the coveted nose sniff! This would be a 10 out of 10 on the human movie scale. Judging from the amount of humans who have went to see it, I'm guessing a lot of them agree with me on this rating. It is rated PG-13 by the motion picture rating humans which means that general audiences are allowed in to see it, and the below 18 year olds don't have to sneak in. Yes, I know they sneak in...they don't fool us dogs. I know the adults wear Spongebob t-shirts too, but they don't tend to have pajamas with footsies when they go to the theatre.
Demon Flash Bandit (Movie Review: The Avengers)
Demon Flash Bandit (Movie Review: The Avengers)
Monday, May 7, 2012
One Crazy, Zooming Dog!
Today I am going to write about Angel Zoom Smokey, my adopted Siberian Husky sister. I want everyone to know that she is adopted because, although she looks a lot like me, she is one crazy dog! When the humans come home, she goes nuts. I stand back and let the humans enter the house, and I am very polite with my greeting. I let them get in, and then I calmly allow them to pet me and love me. Angel zooms through the house practically knocking the humans down and I strongly suspect they don't enjoy her greeting. If they did, Mommy would not be telling her to calm down. Does she listen? Of course not...she is too busy zooming through the house. I'm not saying that perhaps naming her Angel ZOOM Smokey isn't part of the problem, but I don't really think the humans meant for her to live up the the name literally. She certainly does not live up to the name, ANGEL, literally. Just yesterday, there were 2 dingo bones for us, and I was planning to have both of them, but she took one when the humans gave it to her. A true Angel would have allowed me to have it because angels are supposed to be generous and kind. However, she kept it for herself. I don't know why the humans got her to keep me company. I was happy as an only dog!!!
Demon Flash Bandit (Wonderful Dog)
Demon Flash Bandit (Wonderful Dog)
Sunday, May 6, 2012
The "Decepticon" Ride
There is a ride in an amusement park in Europe that looks like a scene from a new Transformers movie. When I first saw it, I thought that the Decepticons had masked themselves to look like a ride; and then, once they got humans on the ride, they went insane with it. Seriously, this ride makes most roller coasters look tame in comparison. I don't know why, but the humans are probably lined up to ride this ride. It is almost like the more dangerous it is, and the more likely it is for the humans to die if there is a mechanical failure; the more the humans enjoy the ride. I've said it many times, the humans are idiots. I doubt if you would see dogs line up to ride this thing. We have more sense. I will share the video for those who want so see this crazy ride for themselves:
http://now.msn.com/living/0505-frightening-amusement-park-ride.aspx
Demon Flash Bandit (This Dog Isn't Going to Ride the "Decepticon" Ride
http://now.msn.com/living/0505-frightening-amusement-park-ride.aspx
Demon Flash Bandit (This Dog Isn't Going to Ride the "Decepticon" Ride
Saturday, May 5, 2012
Dogs: Not Related to Humans!
I have a news video to share with my readers about humans with blue eyes. According to a study, all blue eyed humans are related. Here is the link:
http://www.aol.com/video/all-blueeyed-people-could-be-related/517355056/?icid=maing-grid7%7Cmain5%7Cdl9%7Csec1_lnk2%26pLid%3D158115
This is particularly upsetting to me because I happen to have blue eyes, and you know that eventually, there will be a study saying that we blue eyed dogs are related to the humans. As a proud dog, I do not want to be related to the humans. Humans are idiots, and we dogs laugh at all the silly things they do. I like humans, but having them as "family" (except by adoption) is a different story. Of course it isn't as bad as being related to a cat, but it is still embarrassing to us dogs.
http://www.aol.com/video/all-blueeyed-people-could-be-related/517355056/?icid=maing-grid7%7Cmain5%7Cdl9%7Csec1_lnk2%26pLid%3D158115
This is particularly upsetting to me because I happen to have blue eyes, and you know that eventually, there will be a study saying that we blue eyed dogs are related to the humans. As a proud dog, I do not want to be related to the humans. Humans are idiots, and we dogs laugh at all the silly things they do. I like humans, but having them as "family" (except by adoption) is a different story. Of course it isn't as bad as being related to a cat, but it is still embarrassing to us dogs.
Labels:
blue eyed humans,
cats,
embarrassing,
humans,
idiots,
related
Friday, May 4, 2012
Mowing and Landscaping Crocodile Elvis!
I have a web address to share with my readers today involving a crocodile named Elvis in Australia. Elvis is an enterprising crocodile who plans to start his own lawn service. This is why he needed to drag a lawn mower into his lagoon. I hope his new business does well, and I think he has chosen wisely because, to my knowledge, there are no crocodiles running lawn services or doing landscaping or gardening. Besides, if he goes up to a human's door to ask if they want to use his lawn service, after one look at his teeth, my guess is that most of the humans would hire him. I know I would. I have some good teeth, but my teeth still aren't quite as big and powerful as the ones on a crocodile. If he would be willing to dress up as an Elvis impersonator while he mows, he could probably make a fortune. There are lots of Elvis impersonaltors, but I don't think there is one crocodile Elvis impersonator. My personal congratulations to this enterprising reptile. I hope his new business does well!
Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Approves of Crocodile's New Business Plan)
Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Approves of Crocodile's New Business Plan)
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
Movie Review: The Pirates: Band of Misfits
Yesterday I went to the theatre so that I could do a movie review of The Pirates: Band of Misfits for my blog readers. This story is about the Pirate Captain who is trying to get the most booty so he can win the contest for the honor of being the "Pirate of the Year". There is stiff competition for this coveted prize. The Pirate Captain signs up for the competition on Blood Island, and then leaves the island to sail the seas in search of treasure. On the search, he finds a scientific vessel and meets Charles Darwin who persuades him that he can find the treasure he seeks in London which is where Queen Victoria lives and she hates pirates. However, the Pirate Captain is willing to face the danger in order to win the Pirate of the Year Award. I am a big fan of the Pirates movie franchise, but I must admit that Johnny Depp's performance as the Pirate Captain was not up to his usual brilliant performance, and they did not seem to remember that his name was Jack Sparrow. I can only assume that is a problem with the writers who sometimes forget the character's names. I was also a bit disappointed that the movie gave such a big part to a bird. As my regular readers know, I am not a fan of birds and I think they cause most of the problems in the world. However, the bird was kind of cute so I am making an exception for her in the movie. By the way, her name is Polly. I didn't hear her talk any which shows that she is a nice bird who isn't one of those diva types who gets angry if she doesn't get a lot of lines. I give this movie 4 paws up and a tail wag which is a 7 out of 10 on the human movie scale. It is rated PG, but I think most parents would not have much objection to their children seeing this movie.
Demon Flash Bandit (Movie Reviewer)
Demon Flash Bandit (Movie Reviewer)
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Back to the Future With Demon Flash Bandit
Evidently, some physicists think the future can affect the past, and they are doing quantum entanglement experiments in order to check out this theory. You can read more about this at:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/04/30/quantum-entanglement-experiment-future-past_n_1465517.html?ref=science&icid=maing-grid7%7Cmain5%7Cdl16%7Csec3_lnk1%26pLid%3D156806
This tells me that the scientists need to spend less time in the lab and more time at the theatre (or in front of the television). This has already been shown in many movies, but Back to the Future II comes to mind as one of the best examples. After Marty McFly travelled into the past in the first movie (Back to the Future), when he came back to his time, things were different. In the second movie, he had to travel to the future to change the past. This is not only far more entertaining than an experiment in a lab, but even regular humans can understand it--not like all that scientific goobledigook that the scientists are always talking about. If you have not seen the Back to the Future trilogy, I suggest you watch it in its entirity. They are good movies, and it explains physics to regular people. All you have to do is find yourself a Flux capacitor and a vehicle that will go 88 mph because that is the speed that sends you into the past or future.
For those who read my blog yesterday, I want my humans to bid on the Monkeemobile so I can turn it into the Demonflashbanditmobile. I am happy to annouce that this whole quantum entanglement idea shows that, even if I don't get the car now, at a later time in the future, I can change the past so I can get the car. I can already see myself driving the Demonflashbanditmobile. Life is good!
Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing Time Travel)
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/04/30/quantum-entanglement-experiment-future-past_n_1465517.html?ref=science&icid=maing-grid7%7Cmain5%7Cdl16%7Csec3_lnk1%26pLid%3D156806
This tells me that the scientists need to spend less time in the lab and more time at the theatre (or in front of the television). This has already been shown in many movies, but Back to the Future II comes to mind as one of the best examples. After Marty McFly travelled into the past in the first movie (Back to the Future), when he came back to his time, things were different. In the second movie, he had to travel to the future to change the past. This is not only far more entertaining than an experiment in a lab, but even regular humans can understand it--not like all that scientific goobledigook that the scientists are always talking about. If you have not seen the Back to the Future trilogy, I suggest you watch it in its entirity. They are good movies, and it explains physics to regular people. All you have to do is find yourself a Flux capacitor and a vehicle that will go 88 mph because that is the speed that sends you into the past or future.
For those who read my blog yesterday, I want my humans to bid on the Monkeemobile so I can turn it into the Demonflashbanditmobile. I am happy to annouce that this whole quantum entanglement idea shows that, even if I don't get the car now, at a later time in the future, I can change the past so I can get the car. I can already see myself driving the Demonflashbanditmobile. Life is good!
Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing Time Travel)
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