Oktoberfest at Red Robin

Since I am a dog, I always enjoy sharing the latest "food" news with my readers. Today I am able to report that the Red Robin restaurants will be offering a beer milkshake for Oktoberfest. The tradition of Oktoberfest started in Bavaria (Germany) many years ago. There is some official history that Oktoberfest celebrated the wedding of Crown Prince Ludwig who married Therese of Saxe-Hildburghausen on Oct. 12, 1810. Of course, you came to my blog to find the real truth. It is actually the the "birthday" of the invention of beer. I don't personally like beer, and my humans aren't fond of it, but many of the humans like it. Some of them probably like it a bit too much so it is only natural that the humans would want to celebrate its "birth" by drinking a lot of it. Even a restaurant chain like Red Robin is getting in on the celebration. I don't think this dog would order the beer, but Red Robin's Oktoberfest burger is something in which I could sink my teeth. It is beef on a toasted pretzel bun, and topped with black forest ham. Yes, that is something a dog would enjoy and a vanilla milkshake would go great with it. I do love milkshakes, but I don't think I would like them flavored with beer.

Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing Oktoberfest)

The Olympics

I guess it is about time I write about the Olympics since they are in the news everyday. I think it is only proper that I give the history of the Olympics before I talk about the present day Olympics. The Olympics started out back in ancient Greece. The ancient Greeks had a bunch of gods they worshipped who lived on Mt. Olympus. The gods had a fairly easy life mostly sitting around and watching the humans and eating ambrosia. This shows that the ancient Greek gods must have found the behavior of the humans about as funny as us dogs since they were entertained by the antics of the humans--just as us dogs are. The gods started playing games with each other as entertainment, and they they told the humans to take over because it was more fun to watch and eat ambrosia than to actually have to play the games themselves. Different Greek city states would get together to prove how good they were. The Spartans always won the "how much pain can you endure" game. The Athenians won the "who can philosophize" the best. This went on for a number of years. However, under Roman rule, the games ended largely because the Romans were busy taking over other areas, paving roads, and roaming around (how do you think they got the name, Roman?). Also, the Romans decided to re-name the Greek gods so that people would think that the gods were Roman gods instead of Greek gods. I'm not sure how Zeus felt about being called Jupiter by the Romans, but I assume he wasn't too upset since the local Greek restaurant where my humans eat has a Zeus burger. I can only assume that he gave them the recipe.

Now some of my readers are probably wondering, what about the modern Olympic games? There were no Olympic games for centuries, and then (about 110 years ago) someone came up with the idea of having Olympic games again. I am going to assume it is someone who came up with a business plan of making Olympic souvenirs. It is difficult to sell Olympic souvenirs if there is no Olympics. The humans in charge thought that starting them again was a good idea so now the television networks have something else in the sports venue to cover. I am not a personal fan of the Olympics largely because I have yet to see an interesting category. There is no "who can eat the most milkbones in half an hour". Also, there is no "how fast can you eat a rawhide bone category". There isn't even 'how fast can you fetch a ball" category. Therefore I find the games quite uninteresting so I don't watch them. I'm not sure if the ancient gods watch them either. I'm guessing they don't since I'm not really quite so sure that those gods ever existed in the first place, but they make a nice story, and I can see gods being entertained watching how stupid the humans are. It always makes us dogs laugh!

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog on the Olympics)

Go Out to Eat and Buy a House

IKEA, the restaurant that allows you to buy furniture when you go out to eat has now made life even more convenient for its customers. Now you can buy a pre-fab home when you go out to eat. For a mere $85,000, you can buy the house to put the furniture they sell in. I think this has to be the ultimate in convenient shopping. So many stores don't have this kind of dedication to making their customers' lives easier. I only hope they can keep up with the orders. I know when I got out to dinner, I usually carry $85,000 with me because you never know when you are going to want to buy a house at the restaurant. Of course, I'm guessing they have payment plans, but I've actually never been to an Ikea store so I have no idea what they have. There is one near where Mommy used to live, and it is about an hour away, but Mommy has never bothered to go there. Mommy's taste in furniture tends to be more traditional than what Ikea carries. I have seen their sales ads, and their stuff is okay. For those who want to have dinner and get a house, be sure and go to the nearest Ikea. You will not be disappointed.

Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing Ikea)

I'll Take Some Flying Burgers, Thank You!

Humans in South Carolina saw some bright lights in the sky a couple of days ago. The lights have been explained as a bolide. This dog is not falling for this explanation partly because I have no idea what a bolide is. I've asked other dogs, and they have never heard of it either. Therefore, the "head humans" may fool the other humans giving silly names to things, but we dogs know that the aliens were here. They were probably getting a snack from a local restaurant. Many aliens are very fond of Earth food, and they stop in occasionally to pick up a carry-out order. I know when I go for a ride, I like to stop and get food so I'm going to assume that aliens think the same way since they are obviously an advanced civilization.

In other news, there was an incident of flying Cheetos at Lafayette High School in Indiana. This incident is good news for the aliens. If they can get food to start flying to them, they won't have to come to Earth to pick it up. Whenever they come here to pick up their food, it always excites the humans. I personally would love it too. I could sit here and call McDonalds and tell them to have a burger fly to my house when I am hungry. It beats having to go and get it!

Demon Flash Bandit (Flying Food Delivery)

Dogs Choice of Fish for Dinner

I was just wondering....some homes have aquariums filled with fish. I have to assume that even the humans realize that you can't pet a fish since they have to live underwater so they can't be "pets" by the very definition of the word, pet. However, there must be some reason why the humans have fish in their homes because it takes some trouble to set up an aquarium, and it costs money to feed the fish and take care of them. Since they aren't pets, why would the human go to the trouble and expense of having them in the first place? I have the answer to that question. I have watched television enough to know that when you go into an elegant seafood restaurant, the customer picks out the "live" lobster that he or she wants to eat. Therefore, I have come to the conclusion that the aquarium is set up in the house so dogs and cats can choose which fish they want to eat. That is the only logical reason for having an aquarium in the home. It is particularly welcome for cats since cats really love seafood, and they like to see the food try to get away before it is caught. This brings me to my next point. When the humans have a bird in a cage, is that also for the dog or cat to choose as dinner? Personally, I think it would be a great idea. I would not mind getting to choose a bird for dinner. I'm sure they taste delicious!

Demon Flash Bandit (Fishes are For Eating)

To Carry-out or Not to Carry-out: That is the Question

After four days, the escaped cobra from the Bronx Zoo has still not been located. I have already warned my readers to stay away from the zoo. Zoo officials have shut down the Reptile House, and they say that the snake is hiding there in an area not open to the public. Since these are the same humans who are supposed to be keeping the animals where they belong in the first place, this dog would avoid the zoo, and assume that they don't know what they are doing. The life you save may be your own. The snake is on Twitter and already has 18,000 followers. This really annoys me that this stupid poisonous snake has more followers than I do on this blog. I'm not on Twitter because I think there is something fundamentally wrong with a site that uses a "BIRD" as its symbol. Birds are evil, and I think it is a site that cannot be trusted. In entertainment news, Charlie Sheen has accused his ex-wife, Denise Richards of being a dog thief. If I were Charlie Sheen's dog, I would hide in Denise Richards' car to get out of there. Charlie is much too busy for his dogs, and he might forget to feed them, and a dog takes things like that very seriously. I'm sure they will be ready to return to him when he isn't so busy. The town of Lafayette. Colorado has had some possible UFO encouters recently. As I have pointed out in past blogs, aliens are big fans of our food so, if it really is a UFO, there must be some restaurant in the town that is popular among the aliens. Since Colorado has the Air Force Academy, I suspect it might just be some new form of aircraft that the military is trying out. I doubt that there are that many great restaurants in a small town in Colorado. If I'm wrong, then it is time for me to place a carry-out order. Demon Flash Bandit (Hanging Around with My Humans Who Have Time for Me)

Happy Groundhogs Day--I've Heard They are Delicious!

Today is Groundhogs Day, and the famous groundhog, Punxsutawney Phil has predicted an early spring. I hope he is wrong. I have decided to start a group for dogs with psychic abilities. It will be called ASPCA which stands for Animal Sensory Perception Canine Association. Any dogs reading this who accurately predict the future, be sure and join the association. I am predicting that we will have our own phone line---Ask the Dog. If the humans can do it, you know we can do it better. I am hoping that when I call, they will confirm my prediction that Punxsutawney Phil is wrong, and winter will last longer than Phil predicted. If you ask a dog's opinion, groundhogs aren't that smart!

There has been a possible UFO spotted over the Dome of Rock, an Islamic shrine in the Old City of Jerusalem. I suspect that this is a hoax because, as I have explained in past blogs, the aliens come here for take out food. Since a shrine probably does not serve food, there would be no point in the aliens visiting there-unless they got lost and thought it was a restaurant. With their advanced guidance systems, the likelihood of them being lost is slim so I think it was a hoax.

I hope everyone has a wonderful Groundhogs Day, and if you don't like the groundhogs prediction in your area, I suggest you eat them. I've heard they are tasty--perhaps you could add some barbecue sauce.

Demon Flash Bandit (Predicting Groundhogs are Delicious!)