Sunday, May 14, 2017

Interrogating Squirrels

According to what I have heard, the orange guy in the White House proclaimed, water boarding and other torture is okay.   With his new executive order allowing torture, I went outside and I proceeded to interrogate the little squirrel  varmints.  First I sat them on boards and I proceeded to  water board them with the hose.  They claimed that they had no knowledge of  the squirrel on top of the Donald's head.  Of course, I did not believe them so the torture continued.  I showed them an unshelled pecan wrapped in bacon and then  I ate the bacon and the pecan.  I turned off their squirellnet. Merlyn and Pearl Squirrel have a YouTube show which is very popular with the squirrels.   A squirrel spends most of his day going from  tree to tree looking for food, then they settle in and watch Squirrelnet while they eat  dinner.   After dinner, they try to find their stored food.  Squirrels  are a forgetful group.  Anyway, I knew the  loss of their entertainment  would be the worst torture of all.  This was the final item that got them to answer my question.  The squirrel
 On top of "the Donald's head is a fake unstuffed toy plush squirrel.

Now all is right with my world.  It restored my faith in squirrelkind.  I have to admit that my torture was unnecessary.  It turns out the squirrels are upset about Trump using their likeness on his head.  I understand how they feel.  I am glad Trump isn't wearing a fake husky.  The squirrels and I had a great time chatting.  In fact, they have am upcoming lawsuit against Trump For infringing on their intellectual fur.  I nope they win.   We said our goodbyes and tomorrow, I will be chasing them again.  If you are tired of watching human television, try Squirrtelnet.  The Big Acorn Theory and The Wonderful World of Squirrels ate 2 of their highest rated shows.

Demon Flash Bandit
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