New Television Show: Hunting for Dog Toys

There is a new television show called Toy Hunter. It is about a human who is searching for toys. This show gave me a brilliant idea (let's face it--most of my ideas are brilliant because I'm a dog). Why not a show starring a blue eyed Siberian Husky (myself) who goes in search of dog toys? I have been collecting dog toys since I was a puppy, and I don't think a dog ever outgrows the need for toys. There is just something comforting about having a dog toy around. I think this kind of show would also bring in the doggy demographics which the networks are so concerned about capturing yet do nothing to capture. What do you expect when you allow a bunch of humans to run things? They are dumb, but we dogs still love them anyway. Since humans run the networks, and they don't have much in the brain department, I feel that, in order to get my own show, I may need the help of my readers. How can you help? You can write the network executives at the following address and tell them that you are a fan of Demon Flash Bandit, and that you would love to see me have my own searching for dog toys show. Here is the address:

Nitwit Network Executives
Hollywood, CA
ATTN: Leading Nitwits

This should get your letter sent directly to the proper people since the post office knows that they are some of the dumbest people in the country, and that is all you need for your letter to get to them. Be sure and get those letters mailed in so I can be starring in a television show that a dog would actually enjoy watching. I will tell you now that my tubey toys will be featured in an episode. Any toy that squeaks EVERYWHERE deserves its own episode!

Demon Flash Bandit (Star of Dog Toy Hunter)

Why Make a Cats Musical?

Mommy decided to watch the first and second season of the television show, Fringe. I noticed that the alternate parallel universe is superior to our universe. For those who have never seen Fringe, the alternate universe is similar to our own, but it has some differences. Notably, there is a scene with Olivia riding in a taxi which has an advertisement on top of the car for the musical, Dogs. I have no idea who came up with the idea of the musical, Cats, but I really don't see the point of paying to see a bunch of cats on stage. I'll admit that dogs might not want to be singing and dancing on stage, but if I were a human, I would prefer to see a bunch of dogs over a bunch of cats. I don't even mind cats, but they are still cats--an inferior animal to a dog. I've never seen Cats, but I doubt if they even show them doing the only thing cats do that wins my approval--killing birds! If cats could sing, would people refer to bad singing humans as sounding like a cat being run over....okay maybe that is just me, but I'm sure once I've written it in my blog, it will become a common thing for the humans to say. When something is bad, the humans say it looks like something the cat dragged in which indicates that cats do not know what makes the humans happy. Yet, the humans go and waste good money on a musical starring cats. If you want to see a cat musical, just go to an area with a bunch of feral cats, and listen to them yapping at night. At least you don't have to pay to see that one. It does make one wonder if our universe is really a good place to live when another universe has the good sense to show the musical, Dogs. That is a musical that is worth the price of the ticket!

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Prefers "Dogs")

Wilfred: Great Television Show

Mommy bought the first season of the television show, Wilfred. This television show stars Elijah Wood, and it is about him and a neighbor's dog, Wilfred. To everyone else, Wilfred looks like a dog, but to Ryan (played by Elijah Wood), he looks like a human in a dog suit, and he talks. By the way, I, Demon Flash Bandit, also speak human so that is not at all hard for me to believe. The two become friends and the show is about their "adventures". So far, I've found it to be a delightful show, and I think it shows remarkably good taste that a network like FX would have such a delightful show in their line-up. I love it. Angel Zoom Smokey loves it. I've asked a couple of my pals who are of the dog persuasion, and they also love it. I would suggest you watch this show particularly if you like dogs. It is a good show!

Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing Television Show: Wilfred)

Let's Watch the Bacon Show!

Imagine my happiness when I found a video of a cool new machine that uses 3D technology to cut bacon into perfect strips. It isn't that I really care what shape my bacon is--it could be star shaped for all I care as long as it is bacon, I will eat it. However, the thing I like about the video is that I can watch a huge slab of bacon being cut into smaller pieces. Personally, I could skip slicing it and just go for the huge slab, but I do enjoy watching bacon. I'm surprised bacon has not been offered its own television show. I know all us dogs would tune in, and it has to be better than Jersey Shore or Teen Mom, or any of the other stupid reality shows that the networks are running. There are a couple that I enjoy (like Pawn Stars), but I have yet to see any interesting dog related items being brought in to sell. The things the humans think are valuable is beyond me....if I were running a pawn shop, I would be looking for dog toys and bones. I could care less about the art and other assorted garbage the humans bring in there. But I need to get back to the subject, and that subject is bacon, bacon, and more bacon. If I were a network executive, I would sign that slab of bacon up for its own show. Of course, if the network executives knew what they were doing, there would be a Demon Flash Bandit Show. Anyway, here is the link for those of you who want to watch the only bacon show on television at the moment.
http://now.msn.com/money/0616-bacon-machine.aspx

Write the networks and tell them you want bacon to have its own show that you would most definitely watch. While you are writing, be sure and tell them to sign me up for my own show too. I might even let Angel Zoom Smokey make a guest appearance if she is good, and does what I tell her to do. By the way, my dogster diary today discusses a topic that is important to every dog whose human bathes them: a kid in Texas was given a forced bath, and his parents are suing the school system. My diary is on http://www.dogster.com/ I have a page on there with my diary that I write about as often as I write this blog. I do think this diary is a must-read for dogs! I hope everyone is having a nice--bath free weekend!

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Wants to Watch the Bacon Show)

Note From Mommy

Once again, a human was fooled by a mere puppy. Yes, in a real life situation reminscent of the Welcome Back Kotter television show, a young boy who is 6 years old forged a note from his "Mommy" at school. Epstein always had a note from his mother explaining why he had missed school, and it was always signed "Epstein's Mother". The only difference is that the teacher (Mr. Kotter) never fell for the note. He always knew it was a forgery. Perhaps it being signed "Epstein's Mother" was the reason. However, the secretary at this school let the child leave on the basis of the note which was written on fingerpaint paper and done with a highlighter. I'm not saying a parent in a hurry couldn't write a note on fingerpaint paper with a yellow highlighter, but when it looks like it is written by a child, and many words are misspelled, I would have been far more skeptical. One look at this note told me that there is a child who wanted to leave school and go home. I will share the link so you can see what you think:
http://news.yahoo.com/video/us-15749625/first-grader-forges-note-with-highlighter-finger-paint-29530244.html#crsl=%252Fvideo%252Fus-15749625%252Ffirst-grader-forges-note-with-highlighter-finger-paint-29530244.html
Schools must have changed a lot since my Mommy went to school. She said none of the adults at her schools would have fell for that note. Adult humans must be getting dumber.

Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing Forgery)

Billboard Getting World Wide Attention

I enjoy the new television show, The Walking Dead. However, some of the people living in England aren't too pleased with one billboard advertising the show. The billboard is on the side of a funeral home. For those who would like to see the article, the link is: http://www.medialifemagazine.com/artman2/publish/Alternative_media_43/One-billboard-that-was-just-dead-wrong.asp I suppose that it can be considered in poor taste to put a billboard for a show about zombies on the side of a funeral home, but on the other paw, I wonder just how tasteful it is to have any ad on the side of a funeral home. Would an ad for a cemetery plot or a casket make a grieving family approaching the funeral home feel any better? Perhaps the real problem is not in the advertising itself, but in the funeral home allowing ads to be put on the side of their building. Besides, if you want an ad to get attention, it has accomplished the task. A billboard in England is getting world wide attention. I bet the people at the ad agency are thrilled. Demon Flash Bandit (Not a Zombie Dog)