Detroit, Michigan--Virtual Police Station

Today I am going to share a news article from Detroit, Michigan with my readers. In the future, the city is going to try out the new concept of a "virtual police station". At the moment, this "virtual" police station will have some actual humans working there, but actual humans require actual pay. It won't be long until an accountant tells the city that they can hire virtual workers and save money. This leads me to a whole new situation. If a city is protected by a virtual police force, how long will it take before the criminals decide to go "virtual" too? Let's face it, if criminals were hard workers, they would not be criminals--they would get jobs. Therefore, the idea that eventually, they would decide to start sitting at their computer to commit "virtual crimes" will become a reality. This is important since some of the humans are spending a vast amount of money on "virtual items" which means that everyone will have to be watching their games to report any "virtual crimes" when they happen. Can you imagine how horrible it would be if you don't play Farmville for a couple of weeks and come back to discover all your farm equipment has been stolen? I think this is an alarming trend which should be stopped. Let's tell our local governments that we want real policemen--not virtual policemen--except for traffic cops. Since I haven't got my doggy driver's license yet--I don't want to get in trouble if I take the car for a drive!

Demon Flash Bandit (Real Dog--Not Virtual Dog)

Building My Own Igloo

I heard the radio say we are going to have snow tonight, and they had better be right or this dog is going to go to the weather service and give them some puppy slaps of justice. I love snow, and you don't promise a dog snow and not deliver! As usual, my human was not happy about it. She was actually hoping that it was a radio station out of Saginaw instead of Detroit. I have no idea why the humans around here don't like snow. It is lots of fun to play in and it is cold and delightful!

I have decided to build an igloo this year. I plan to build it big enough so the whole family can live in it. You can be sure it won't have the one thing that annoys me in this house--the furnace. Yes, the house is toasty warm even when it is extremely cold outside. I keep hoping the humans will turn it off and not use it at all...it would even save them money because I hear them talk about how it costs a lot of heat the house. My idea of not turning it on would save them a small fortune which could be better spent on dingo bones if you ask me. I shed enough fur to keep them warm so it is a win-win situation for all of us if they decide to live in the igloo I plan to build. My only problem at the moment is how I can keep the igloo livable year round. There is no problem during the winter having a nice cold place to live, but then spring will rear its ugly head and threaten to melt my igloo. This is the same problem that Frosty the Snowman has had to deal with. He gets a magical hat, and is able to dance around until the sun comes out and causes problems. I need to watch some Frosty specials on television to see if he ever found a way to work out that problem. I've got to go now. I'm going to have an architect draw up the plans for my igloo. You don't expect me to live in an ordinary igloo, do you? I plan on having a lot of special features that the humans don't have....like a room for storing and eating of bones which I call the bonery. You can be sure that there will be one thing missing from my igloo that the humans think you need--a bathtub and/or shower. I see no need for baths so I'm not wasting money putting a bathtub in my igloo. I just heard the doorbell ring....it must be the architect...I'll write more tomorrow!

Demon Flash Bandit (Igloo Builder)

California's First Dog, SutterBrown, to the Rescue

Imagine how happy I was to find out that California's first dog is helping the state pay off their deficit. I've often said dogs should be in charge, and this proves my point. Governor Jerry Brown's first dog, SutterBrown, is doing his part to help. SutterBrown is a very busy Corgi. He has a line of merchandise from which the proceeds go to paying down the state deficit. I might add that the Gubenator never had a first dog who did anything to help the budget. You would think a big, macho hero like Arnold could at least match the work of the SutterBrown. So far, SutterBrown, has brought in $700. to help the deficit. Now if the state of California will get Octomom to move and put the money the dog has made into the state budget, they might actually have a budget surplus. To see the video about the first dog, go to this address: http://abclocal.go.com/kabc/story?section=news/state&id=8049156 Perhaps Bo Obama should start his own line of merchandise to help the national deficit. On the local front, Charlie Sheen's show in Detroit, Michigan did not do well. This was not a surprise to my humans so they did not bother to attend the show, and it looks like that made a good call on that one. Charlie Sheen is a talented actor, and I hope he gets his life together before his life becomes as big a bomb as that show. I also want to mention that after my blog yesterday about the April Fool's Day joke done on the Internet by Toshiba in which I thought a computer for dogs would be an excellent idea, I have further proof of my genius. I have a website to share with you that has dogs using computers in scientific research. The site's address is: http://abclocal.go.com/kabc/story?section=news/state&id=8049156 Since dogs are already using computers, I think it is time for the computer manufacturers to get busy with a computer for dogs. I hope everyone is having a wonderful weekend. Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Could Use My Own Computer)

Celebrating Paczki Day

Today is paczki day in the Detroit, Michigan metropolitan area. Yes, the day that the Polish people who settled here make a delicious doughnut for "Fat Tuesday". This dog plans to have at least one paczki in my paws before the day it over. I have an elaborate plan in place in case the humans say they aren't for dogs. I plan to wear my hat and my Superman cape. No one can refuse to give Superman a paczki. This is when my blue eyes come in handy since the humans don't expect a dog to have blue eyes. Sure, my humans know I have blue eyes, but my plan is to visit all the neighbors and get a paczki from each of them. They don't call it Fat Tuesday for nothing. The best thing about the situation is that I don't have to give up anything for Lent. If I did, I would just give up some fur because I'm always shedding it everywhere anyway so it isn't much of a sacrifice. Giving up something you love doesn't sound like fun.

I was browsing the Internet for some interesting tidbits from the news and I found the most depressing contest ever. A radio station in Aschaffenberg, Germany is having a contest in which the prize is a check for $4,200. that MUST be spent on death insurance. It seems kind of silly to me since I thought death is one of those inevitable things to happen. To win the prize, the entrants must come up with the most clever epitaph for their tombstone. I'm waiting to see if the epitaph, "I won the contest so I can die now" will be one of the clever entries. The amazing fact is that over 600 people have entered the contest. If you ask this dog, it sounds like the people who live there must not be having much fun in their lives because this is a contest that this dog wouldn't bother to enter. Of course, I have no plans to cross over the bridge. I plan to stay and enjoy important events like "Paczki Day" forever.

Demon Flash Bandit (Celebrating Paczki Day)