Stuart Little: Movie in Which a Mouse is Allowed to Drive a Car

I met a guy at the store, and he wanted to talk about the movie, Stuart Little.  For those who haven't seen it, it is an older movie (1999) in which a family adopts a mouse.  There was one family member who did not approve of the adoption, and that family member was the cat.  This movie annoyed me because they had Stuart driving a car.  Before I go any further, just how fair is it that they let a mouse drive around in a car when dogs aren't allowed to drive?  Or so my humans have told me when I get behind the steering wheel.  Dogs are much better drivers than mice.  I realize that Stuart was not actually driving the car, but it was being driven by his stunt double who was a rat.  A mouse could never drive a car because his back paws are not long enough to reach the pedals.   It  is good to have a stunt double.  I have one named Phantom Fast Snowdog.  The studios do not want me to take any risks when doing a film.  I can see their point--I'm way too valuable!

For those who want my movie review, I give this movie 4 paws up.  On the human movie scale it would be a 7 out of 10.

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Wants to Drive)

Happy 75th Birthday to the Weinermobile!

Milo Kunis has admitted to having a butt double in her latest acting job. This is why I feel it is so important for me to let everyone know that when you see Demon Flash Bandit's butt, that is my actual butt. I know my readers might be wondering since I have a stunt double, Phantom Fast Snowman. I only use him for important stunts like wearing doggy clothing. If you see a doggy butt and the dog is wearing clothing, it would be Phantom, but if the dog is wearing only his fur, then it is me....all me. I might add that I don't like to brag, but I think my curly tail is adorable!
I've received many compliments on it from the humans, and it is nice to know that my beautiful butt is appreciated. I would never wear clothing over my butt because it is just too adorable!

Now that I've put your mind at ease about the butt stunt double, it is time to move onto a more important suject. Happy 75th Birthday to the Oscar Mayer Weinermobile!!!!! I have blogged about the weinermobile in previous blogs, and it is one super cool car. A human is being given credit for coming up with the idea of the weinermobile, but I'm not believing it. The weinermobile had to be the brilliant idea of a dog. I've got to go now. I am working on plans for a new car--a hamburgermobile for McDonalds.

Demon Flash Bandit (Weinermobile is a Cool Car)

Media Reading my Blog For Story Ideas

I know I should be used to it by now being the high profile celebrity dog that I am, but today's headline on MSN.com news reminded me once again of just how important my blogs are to the media. Just a couple of days ago, I wrote about insuring my beautiful tail with Lloyd's of London. Today when I logged onto the computer's MSN.com home page, there was a item entitled, "Celebs Insure the Darnedest Things". Sure, I read the article. They were wise enough not to mention me personally. My guess is they didn't mention me so I don't sue them for using my idea for a story; but we all know that they got the idea for that article from me. I'm a celebrity dog insuring my tail, and then seeing a story on celebrities insuring body parts--not a mere coincidence. We all know they were reading my blog for story ideas. Most people just read it for entertainment and knowledge, but now I realize that the news people are reading it for future stories. In fact I have suspected it for some time because this is not the first time that a story in the news has been on a subject that I have blogged about in previous days. I have no plans to sue because I am also a bit flattered that they depend on me so much, and I know that the humans usually don't have any good ideas of their own which is why they have dogs. However, I am not adverse to the idea of having a Demon Flash Bandit day which would be a holiday to honor me, Demon Flash Bandit. It would also be a day in which I would get gifts. I happen to enjoy gifts so I think a day in my honor is appropriate. Speaking of celebrities, my brother is using my stunt double as the logo for his movie site, http://www.silverscreenhub.com/ He would have used Angel Zoom Smokey or myself, but we don't like to pose wearing stupid looking human items. Phantom Fast Snowman doesn't mind modeling things which is why he is our stunt dog. I think Jeff picked an awesome logo because you can't get better than a dog! Wow, it has been about 10 minutes since my last nap so I'd better get back to dreamland. Demon Flash Bandit (Celebrity Dog)

King Demon Flash Bandit

As you can see from today's photo of Phantom Fast Snowman, my stunt double had a bit too much green beer and took off his Irish shirt. If it had been me, I would have taken off the silly hat, but you would think Phantom had stuffing for brains. I suppose it has its advantages since Phantom might complain about being my stunt double if he had brains. Anyway, everyone here had a happy St. Patrick's Day, and I hope it was a good day for my readers too.

Since yesterday was St. Patrick's Day, it has made this dog think of castles. Actually, I am thinking that a dog like myself should be living in a castle instead of a normal house. Not that I think napping would be any better in a castle, but if it were a castle with a 24 hour Burger King chef, that would be like heaven for me. I could get up in the middle of the night and order a whopper with bacon. Bacon is also very delicious!!! There would be no need for those silly fries or onion rings. I don't like them anyway. The "chef could keep shakes and pies on the "menu" since I like them too. I checked the nutrition guide and BK, bacon, shakes, and pies are all good for a dog. I happen to be an expert on nutrition which is why I wrote the nutrition chart that I consulted. I think the silly humans use a different chart, and it is as silly as they are. If you go by their "nutrition" chart, you would never eat the best tasting stuff. I say if it tastes good, you are supposed to eat it. Anyway, all this talk of food has made me hungry. I am going to go to the kitchen and see if there is any food hanging around in there uneaten.

Demon Flash Bandit (King Demon Flash Bandit)

Happy St. Patrick's Day

Top of the mornin' to everyone. Today is St. Patrick's Day. This brings up a subject which is very dear to me. Why is there no Demon Flash Bandit day? I've written the White House several times suggesting they add it to the list of holidays; but so far, I have received no response from them. Anyway, this is the day that most of the humans become Irish. (You know there are always a few out there who don't get with the program and don't become Irish.) I have posted a photo of myself taken with my Irish party hat on my head. Okay, it isn't really me, but it is my stunt double, Phantom Fast Snowman. I have a contract that states that if the humans want to dress me in something I consider to be stupid (and that is pretty much everything), they have to use Phantom. There are a few photos of me wearing a hat, but believe me, they were done without my approval. I also expect extra money for those times. A human can't just expect a dog to do what they want without some kind of compensation.

I think it is appropriate that I give a brief history of St. Patrick's Day and why we celebrate that day. St. Patrick lived a long time ago. I think it was in the 1950's which would make him super old. He decided to move to Ireland because he thought it would be a cool place to live. Before he came to Ireland, there were snakes everywhere, and he wasn't fond of snakes so he tricked them into moving elsewhere. He told them that there was a snake amusement park in another country, and all of us know how much snakes love to ride roller coasters so they left and never came back. I'm not sure how true this story happens to be since there are lots of pubs in Ireland, and maybe St. Patrick just "thought" he saw some snakes. When the humans drink enough green beer, some of them can see anything. Just ask Phantom Fast Snowman. He tends to spend a bit too much time drinking gin himself. Anyway, then St. Patrick discovered some leprechauns, and he put them to work making Lucky Charms cereal, which is how they amassed so much gold. The humans are always trying to get their paws on the gold which is stupid since they should be trying to get the cereal. Humans have a fascination for gold so if a dog can get some, he can trade it for all sorts of useful things--like Burger King burgers or dingo bones.

I hope you have learned something from this blog. I love to share my vast knowledge of world history which I have been studying ever since I was a puppy.

Demon Flash Bandit (Happy St. Patrick's Day)

Introducing: Phantom Fast Snowman, Stunt Dog

Today I am introducing a new member of the family, and my personal stunt double, Phantom Fast Snowman. As you can see from the photo, he is a full size stuffed husky that has blue eyes just like me. However, since he is not a real dog, he does not mind being dressed in outlandish costumes. Also, he has no complaints about anything the humans might decide to do to him no matter how embarrassing it would be for a real dog like myself. Phantom will also be Angel Zoom Smokey's stunt double. I am pleased to welcome Phantom to our family. The best thing about Phantom is that he does not want my Burger King, my bones, or my toys. Phantom does not bother me when I am napping either. Of course, Phantom does not possess my bubbly personality, but staying clear of my bones makes up for that. I don't want the competition anyway. It is about time I had a stunt double. I have been a star since I was a puppy, and all us dogs know that stars are too important to do their own stunts. What if they got hurt? It could delay filming and cost the studios a lot of money. Anyway, you will be seeing more of Phantom on my blog--no doubt wearing stupid clothes that Angel and I refuse to wear. Mommy should have known better than to buy the clothing for us in the first place, but at least now she can be happy because it won't go to waste. Phantom can model it for her.

I'm wishing all my readers a nice day from Demon Flash Bandit, Angel Zoom Smokey, and our new stunt double, Phantom Fast Snowman.

Demon Flash Bandit (I Finally Have My Own Stunt Dog!)