Zombie Dog to Scare Trick or Treaters

Zombies are dead humans who come back to life to eat other humans' brains. This must be highly frustrating for the zombies because the humans have such small, uninteresting brains. This might explain why the zombies never seem to get any smarter no matter how many brains they eat. Dogs do not become zombies because, once a dog has crossed over the bridge, we are not going to hang around Earth to eat brains. We dogs would prefer to hang out in paradise, and enjoy playing and napping until our humans and pals arrive when we can see them again. Only the humans would be dumb enough to hang around Earth and act stupid like zombies. However, you can order a zombie dog as a Halloween decoration which is super cool, and for only $5,700, I can only imagine how many people are going to buy this animated dog to scare the trick or treaters. Since those trick or treaters want free candy that a dog could be eating, I say anything that scares the little deadbeats away is well worth the cost. I am not a fan of human puppies coming to the door and eating all of a dog's candy. For those of you who say it is not the dog's candy, I say, if the dog can get it, then it is the dog's candy! This zombie dog is a very cool item, and I'm sure everyone will want one. Here is the link so that my readers can buy this super cool zombie item:
http://www.thehorrordome.com/zombie-guard-dog-haunted-house-amimatronic.aspx

Demon Flash Bandit (Writing About Zombie Dogs)

A Solution to an Everyday Problem

I wonder if my fellow dogs have experienced one of my pet peeves about the humans. Just when a dog lies down and gets comfortable, the humans want to walk over you. Sure, the humans will say it is because some of us like to lay down in the middle of everything and they refer to it as "being in the way" which if you ask me is a bit insulting to us dogs. We aren't "in the way", but it is the humans who are trespassing into our territory. I am a busy dog who has only so much time for eating and sleeping, and I do not like to be disturbed when I am trying to take a nap. As usual, because I am a genius, I have found a solution for this problem. In fact, I have found 2 solutions. One is a human bridge that the human can put over the dog thus being able to walk over the dog without disturbing the dog's rest. The other is putting the human in a crate until our nap is over. Humans put dogs in crates which has never made any sense to me because I always thought it was the humans who should be in the crate while the dog runs free. Yes, once again, Demon Flash Bandit comes through with solutions to everyday problems!

Demon Flash Bandit (Genius Dog With Great Ideas)