A Tail of Dogula!

Once upon a time, there lived a count whose name was Dogula. Dogula was a dogpire which means that he was one of the undead--a dog who would live forever. The only catch was that he could not go out in sunlight, and he could not eat garlic which was okay because he wasn't big on garlic anyway. Dogpires live by sucking the blood out of birds so they are good creatures because they rid the world of evil birds--and all birds are evil. Dogula lived in a castle, and the humans and dogs in the village were all very proud of him for ridding their area of evil birds. Dogula enjoyed a good bone, and he was always watching out for his neighbors. One day, the castle was attacked by a rival country--filled with birds. Dogula managed to win the battle, and there was peace and happiness in his kingdom from that time until now. Dogula was truly a good dog and a great leader!!!

Demon Flash Bandit (Dogula--Good Dog)

Don't Mess with Burger King!

Occasionally, a dog will read a story about the humans that is so ridiculous, you wonder how the humans could have ever survived this long. The story today (and this was in the news) is the story of an event that happened in Oakland Park, Florida at a Burger King there. Tara Lyons, age 38, went through drive-thru and ordered a breakfast sandwich for a total expense of $1.06. She decided that someone in the restaurant had spit on her sandwich so she parked her car, and went inside. At that point, she jumped over the counter and started throwing breakfast sandwiches and condiments at the employees. Broward Country Sheriffs arrested her and she was charged with assault and battery and burglary. Once she gets her sentencing from the local police, I think the Burger King should arrest her, and this dog thinks he should order "off with her head". The world is better off without humans with her kind of behavior. If he decides to show mercy, he could sentence her to life in the dungeon with no chance for parole. When a human starts messing with Burger King sandwiches, this dog gets angry. There are some things that are unforgivable, and messing with BK sandwiches is one of those things.

For those of you who are wondering....yes, it was really Tara Lyons. It was not Charlie Sheen in drag. I know some of you think it sounds like something he would do at this point. I also don't think she was taking the drug, Charlie Sheen, because her face wasn't melted off, and her body had not exploded.


Demon Flash Bandit (Don't Mess With Burger King!)