To my dear, dear humans,
I feel I must write you to remind you of my love for you. As you know, the love and loyalty of a dog is one of life's richest blessings. I assure you that I would prefer lying on your bed under the air conditioning than to be holding vigil in this war against the birds. It must be 70 degrees F, and this husky thinks it shouldn't be so hot!
I remember all the happy times I have spent with you--the delicious food the treats, my wonderful squeaky toys, and the tummy rubs. It is this great love that I have for you that brings me to the back yard to wage war on the birds. When that mommy bird attacked my human brother not once, but twice, this dog had to take matters into his own paws. I can't trust a matter of such importamce to the government. The govt.never gets anything done unless some wealthy campaign contributer pushes to get involved. Plus it would get a fight from the birdseed interests. This is why a dog has to take care of the matter with my army of dogs and cats I organized. Try not to worry too much about me in my absence. I have to end this letter now because some birds are surrounded by Captain Fluffybutt's cavalry of cats. I hope to be with you soon, but those squirrels are looking a bit nutty--I think it is their diet. So many enemies, so little time!
Love, Demon Flash Bandit
P.S. Demon's Human Mom here: Demon and Angel are inside napping after their 30 minute battle. We humans feel safer now, and we love them too!