Call Deputy Dog--My Humans are Annoying Me

Help--call Deputy Dog, call the Canine Cops, call the Puppy Police....just don't call PETA those idiots hate a dog like me with AKC papers.  What do I need the doggy authorities to deal with?  I hate to write this because I love my humans and I know they love me, but last night Mommy tried to feed me something called macaroni and cheese.  Sure, she might be dumb enough to eat it, but I could tell from across the room that there was no meat scent in the bowl.  Therefore, I would not even get near enough to smell it up close.  I even suspect those little elbow looking things might have been vegetables.  Mommy said they were pasta, but I think pasta is just another word for vegetables.
This dog does not eat vegetables.  I have let my humans know this numerous times in the past when they have tried to sneak some veggies into my food, and I have not eaten them.  Mommy also offered some to Angel Zoom Smokey. and she also refused to eat it.  That dog will try stuff that I won't go near so I know it has to be bad when she won't eat it either.  Thank dog I am a genius who isn't fooled into eating the human food that is inedible.  Have you seen brussel sprouts?  Humans eat them, and I don't even think they are food!

Demon Flash Bandit (Food Inspector)