My Hobby: Collecting Bones!

I'm writing this blog later than usual today because I've been a busy dog-you know how it is for us celebrity dogs. Okay, the truth is that I have been laying around napping and I was comfortable and decided that writing the blog could wait. My readers know me so they probably aren't believing that "busy" excuse anyway! Besides, there isn't much of interest for me to write about today. Mommy did eat at Taco Bell and I got to share some cinnamon twist dessert things, and I did find that interesting, but really not up to my usual blog topics. As you know, I like to write about the things that other dogs are afraid to bark anything about. I did see one news item about how napkin rings add a distinctive touch to the table, but I'm a dog, and I could care less about napkin rings unless they are those cool round bones that a dog can get his teeth into! Speaking of bones, I don't want to brag, but I have quite a nice collection. I am always adding to it because some of them slowly disappear--I have no idea how this happens....one minute, you are enjoying a big bone, and a couple of weeks later, it is half its size. My theory is that elves come in the middle of the night and chip away at it when a dog is sleeping. I have yet to stay up all night to test that theory, but it sounds reasonable to me. I wonder if those elves are the ones who wrote the song about all the bones that are connected to each other---you know, the tail bone is connected to the tummy bone, the tummy bone is connected to the liver bone....now hear the bark of the dog. The real problem bone is the funny bone because you never know what it is connected to since it is always moving around trying to be funny which, of course, is how it got the name, funny bone. I must admit that I do enjoy writing about bones. I enjoy chewing them more, but writing comes in second. I hope that my readers are having a nice day and have their own bone collections because everyone needs a hobby!

Demon Flash Bandit (Bone Collector)

My New Hobby

As a dog, I have decided that I need a new hobby because a dog needs to have something important to do with his time. I contemplated many activities that I could get involved with. I could do the usual things that many dogs like to do with their time---fetch, run, guard things, but I wanted something that set me apart so that I wouldn't be just like all the other dogs. I finally found the perfect hobby for me. I have learned to yap constantly in a high pitch yap that seems to go right for the humans' nerves. In fact, it gets on Angel Zoom Smokey's nerves if you do it long enough while she is trying to sleep, which is one of the most fun times to yap. She gets mad and snarls at me, and I keep right on yapping. It isn't just a hobby, it is a laugh riot. The reason it works so well is that normally, I am a very quiet dog, but I've found that if a quiet dog occasionally yaps for about 24 hours straight, it is so highly effective at getting a dog noticed, that is becomes a hobby for the dog. Don't get me wrong--I'm not talking about barking which is totally and completely different from yapping. Barking is something all dogs do on occasion, but yapping is a high pitched whine that I have perfected into an art form. I am also quite the trooper. I continue yapping even when it is bugging me. I think I will start the Demon Flash Bandit School of Yapping. I'm sure other dogs would love to have yapping as a cool hobby that they can enjoy too.

Demon Flash Bandit (Yapping at Everyone and Everything)