Tomorrow is Thanksgiving in the United States, and I have to say that even though my family will be eating our tradtitional Thanksgiving pizza, I am glad that many families will be eating turkey. Turkeys are birds, and this dog hates birds! Therefore, Thanksgiving is a holiday that is dedicated to killing our feathered enemies. Yes, when you take a bite out of that turkey, you can think about all the birds who left their "bird bombs" on your possessions or even your person. They go around dropping those bombs wherever they please like they own the planet. I might add that 2 turkeys get a Presidential pardon every year. Where do those birds get to live? Disneyland...yeah, they get to live out their lives having fun yet dogs aren't allowed into Disneyland. This is what happens when you have an entertainment complex run by a mouse. He does allow Goofy and Pluto, but of course, they are working at the park. It isn't like they can sit back and enjoy themselves like those pardoned turkeys. It does not seem fair to this dog, but as all of us know, life is not fair. I do promise that if I am elected President, I will not pardon any turkeys at Thanksgiving. There is no way I could let a bird go free. It is against my instincts as a dog to do so. Besides, if they were not guilty of being turkeys, they would not need a pardon. Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!
Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing Pardoning Turkeys)
Showing posts with label Pluto. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Pluto. Show all posts
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Conspiracy Theory Involving Mickey Mouse
Today I read the story of a Pit Bull who was thrown into the garbage in Newark, New Jersey after being on the verge of starvation. His name is Patrick and he is currently under veterinary care. For those who are interested. there is a miracle page on Facebook for Patrick. The address of his page is:
http://www.facebook.com/ThePatrickMiracle/
I read that the fifth season of Mad Men is on hold over money issues. I know this show has won an Emmy. Other than the delightful scene in the first season when the lady shot the birds of the neighbor who threatened their dog, which was awesome, I'm not a major fan of the show. I think the show is financed by the tobacco companies because it seems to just have a bunch of humans constantly smoking cigarettes.
Speaking of entertainment, several actors have been cast in the HBO production of Game Change. Ed Harris has been chosen to play John McCain which I think would be better played (this is Jeff's opinion also) by the Crypt Keeper. Sure, the Crypt Keeper might be a bit too young looking for the part, but you have to go with the best you can get. Julianne Moore is going to play Satan Playin. Oh, sorry, that is Sarah Palin. Wait a minute, I think I spelled it right the first time. It is refreshing to see those actors playing the bad guys for a change. Okay, McCain isn't really that bad a guy, but who would want Satan taking over?
Now onto the most important part of the blog: the latest conspiracy theory which I came up with myself. I think Mickey Mouse is out to take over the world. I'm not the first to come up with this theory. It was exposed in a television documentary, Pinky and the Brain. Both were lab mice, and Brain was trying to take over the world in every episode. This is based on Mickey Mouse, but the creator of it did not want to get sued by Disney so he didn't use the actual mouse who is making the plans for world domination. Mickey started his theme parks just so he could make lots of money to finance his world takeover. Just look at how he treats dogs. We aren't allowed in his part because he knows we would see through his plans and warn the humans. He does allow 2 dogs, and this is the scariest part. Pluto, the smart dog can't talk, but Goofy, the stupid dog can. You know he probably had some surgery done to Pluto to keep him from talking so that he can't warn the humans about Mickey's evil plans. It is also why Mickey has such big ears--so he can listen to anyone who might be divulging his plans. Speaking of big ears, if Mickey hears someone speaking the truth about him, he sends Dumbo to fly over and leave a "bird type bomb" on the person. I don't have to tell you that a bomb left by an elephant is even worse than one dropped by a bird. Next time you buy that innocent stuffed Mickey Mouse for a small child, just remember, there is no telling what Mickey has put into the toy--listening devices, mind control devices, etc. Buy one at your own risk. You have been warned by Demon Flash Bandit so you know better than to take needless risks.
Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Can't Be Fooled by Mice)
http://www.facebook.com/ThePatrickMiracle/
I read that the fifth season of Mad Men is on hold over money issues. I know this show has won an Emmy. Other than the delightful scene in the first season when the lady shot the birds of the neighbor who threatened their dog, which was awesome, I'm not a major fan of the show. I think the show is financed by the tobacco companies because it seems to just have a bunch of humans constantly smoking cigarettes.
Speaking of entertainment, several actors have been cast in the HBO production of Game Change. Ed Harris has been chosen to play John McCain which I think would be better played (this is Jeff's opinion also) by the Crypt Keeper. Sure, the Crypt Keeper might be a bit too young looking for the part, but you have to go with the best you can get. Julianne Moore is going to play Satan Playin. Oh, sorry, that is Sarah Palin. Wait a minute, I think I spelled it right the first time. It is refreshing to see those actors playing the bad guys for a change. Okay, McCain isn't really that bad a guy, but who would want Satan taking over?
Now onto the most important part of the blog: the latest conspiracy theory which I came up with myself. I think Mickey Mouse is out to take over the world. I'm not the first to come up with this theory. It was exposed in a television documentary, Pinky and the Brain. Both were lab mice, and Brain was trying to take over the world in every episode. This is based on Mickey Mouse, but the creator of it did not want to get sued by Disney so he didn't use the actual mouse who is making the plans for world domination. Mickey started his theme parks just so he could make lots of money to finance his world takeover. Just look at how he treats dogs. We aren't allowed in his part because he knows we would see through his plans and warn the humans. He does allow 2 dogs, and this is the scariest part. Pluto, the smart dog can't talk, but Goofy, the stupid dog can. You know he probably had some surgery done to Pluto to keep him from talking so that he can't warn the humans about Mickey's evil plans. It is also why Mickey has such big ears--so he can listen to anyone who might be divulging his plans. Speaking of big ears, if Mickey hears someone speaking the truth about him, he sends Dumbo to fly over and leave a "bird type bomb" on the person. I don't have to tell you that a bomb left by an elephant is even worse than one dropped by a bird. Next time you buy that innocent stuffed Mickey Mouse for a small child, just remember, there is no telling what Mickey has put into the toy--listening devices, mind control devices, etc. Buy one at your own risk. You have been warned by Demon Flash Bandit so you know better than to take needless risks.
Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Can't Be Fooled by Mice)
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