Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Mommy's New Conspiracy Theory

I have been unable to post a blog for almost a week now which proves to me that my enemies, the birds, have taken over BlogSpot.  I can't think of any other logical explanation for my inability to access the site in order to bark my words of wisdom.

Today I have a new conspiracy theory to share with my readers.  This one is not mine, but it is that of my human.  She was shopping in Target the other day. She saw that sign that tells the humans the date that a human has to have been born by in order to buy certain items like alcoholic beverages that are only available to people over 21.  When the humans reach the age of 21, they are considered "adults". Yeah, I know,  we dogs know that most of the humans never really act like adults, but you can't hold the humans to a dog's standards.  Anyway, she saw the year, 1993, and that is when one of those ideas came to her.  You know the humans have a good idea when you can see the light bulb above their heads, and hers was a 100 watt bulb so you know it is brilliant!  The reason Mommy and others of her generation are getting old is because the youngsters have had the nerve to grow up and become adults.  Mommy certainly did not give them permission to do so, but they have done it anyway.  Imagine the repercussions this has on the world.  The kids who never learned how to pull up their "pull up training pants" are now considered old enough to run the world.  If those "tots" had the foresight not to grow up, Mommy and her cohorts would still be young-or younger anyway.  As a general rule, I would think that Mommy is being silly, but I can see her point.  I am now 10 years old, and as an older dog,  I can understand why she might get upset about such a thing.  When I look around at the young puppies chasing their tails when they could be napping,  I wonder if they will ever have the sense to kill birds like us dogs are supposed to do.  However, I told Mommy everything would be okay because the older dogs probably thought the same thing about her and me and we turned out okay so I guess the world will still continue even with the babies born in 1993 taking over.

Demon Flash Bandit (Sharing a New Conspiracy Theory)

No comments:

Post a Comment