Yesterday I went to the vet. I wasn't sick but I went in for routine shots and heartworm tests. This is why I am writing this blog. I think the heartworm tests were a ruse to get my blood and clone me. I know some of you might think I am being overly paranoid, but I think it is the only logical conclusion. First, I have never met a worm that I have ever even remotely liked so I have never opened up my heart to a worm. Sure, I'm a nice dog who tends to be loving, but that love does not extend to the worm world. When I entered the vet's office, I was petted and told what a handsome dog I am. Of course, that is just a natural reaction any normal human would have to a dog of my magnificent good looks. The vet took me to the back to take my blood which is where they have their secret cloning lab. I had to go alone so that my humans would not suspect what the true purpose of the so called blood tests would be. Dumb as most of the humans are, a couple of smarter ones might get suspicious particularly when they see the boxes that say, Clone Kit. Sure, I understand why the vet would want clones of me. I am the ultimate in doggy perfection, but I think they should have to have both my permission and the permission of my humans before they can clone me. I don't care how many copies they make, those dogs will never manage to match my intelligence and beauty, but I'm sure they would be super handsome dogs. I just hope they aren't doing it for some kind of Clone Wars. I should have checked their computer system to make sure George Lucas is not involved in their practice.
Demon Flash Bandit (Wants no Part of Clone Wars)