Movie Review: The Artist

This is the movie review that everyone has been waiting for me to post--my review of The Artist! Yes, the movie that stars the dog, Uggy. The movie that won an Oscar because of Uggy....this is truly a revolutionary movie. It is revolutionary, not just because it starred a dog, but also because it was a silent movie filmed in black and white. In the future, when you hear of a movie being filmed in black and white that is silent, you will know that the studio has faith in the movie. This is obviously the wave of the future--not more stupid humans talking throughout the movie, except of course, for the two oldsters who did a running commentary throughout the movie in Brighton, Michigan where I saw the movie. Yes, 2 people whose commentary was very important because it only took them an hour to realize it was a silent movie. I suspect that these 2 couldn't resist commenting because of the excitement of seeing a new silent movie when they hadn't seen one since they were middle aged. I might add that the MJR Theatre in Brighton did not disappoint because the orchestra they hired to sit in the front of the theatre while the movie was playing was very cool, and the 6 people that were watching the movie were very impressed with the orchestra. To quote my human brother, Jeff, talkies are dead--shut uppys are the future. Being in his twenties, he was very impressed with the new technology which makes his stupid 3D television in his room look silly by comparison. Jeff did enjoy the movie, but I think it was because of the cool 3D effects in The Artist.

The Artist is a good movie, but it relies on an interesting story which is unusual for Hollywood. The "Artist", George Valentin, is a silent movie star who could not adjust to the talkies, which happened to several big silent movie stars in the past. There was tapdancing in the movie so you know it was a super cool movie--even though they did not have the good sense to have a cane to help with the dancing. There was a lot of cool music like Pennies From Heaven which made me want to get my ukelele out to play along. It is a shame that the humans who wrote that song didn't seem to realize that the song makes God seem cheap....why not dollars from heaven? Dollars also don't hurt when a couple of hundred fall on you. Besides, pennies cost more to mint so it would be cheaper to send down dollars. Evidently, in the early part of the 20th century, the theatres did not have to deal with as many smart alecs as there are now. Of course, back then a penny could also buy things. Now it won't even buy a piece of gum.

Uggy should have gotten top billing because he was the real star. In fact, if not for Uggy, the stupid human would have died before the movie was over. The dog had his work cut out for him watching out for Valentin. Jeff said the title of this movie in a redneck area is "Stupid French Guy Who Can't Speak American Good.

I actually wish I could have recorded the commentary of the 2 humans in Brighton for those who aren't up on their history. When the movie flashed the year of the stock market crash, they said it was the big stock market crash. If you saw this movie without their commentary, you might not have been able to surmise that it was the year of the big crash merely from the newspaper headlines, "stock market crashes". I feel so bad for the humans who don't have intellectuals in the audience to give them these bits of wisdom. I don't know how you could ever watch the movie and understand what is going on unless you have those bits of wisdom.

I give this movie a tail wag, 4 paws up, several kisses, a big hug, and a heartfelt thank you for Uggy from me. I liked this movie very much, and look forward to all the new silent movies that will be forthcoming from the studios. I am hoping for a sequel....maybe when the talkies go from black and white to color. This is a 10 out of 10 on the human movie scale. This is truly a good movie, and I enjoyed it very much!!!

Demon Flash Bandit (Movie Review: The Artist)