Saturday, October 16, 2010

My Side: I Want to Keep the Candy!

After reading my blog article yesterday, I have been getting lots of pawmail supporting my opinion from the political right. Several Conservatives have told me that I should run for political office. I know this is true, but I have to admit that my motives for giving the little human puppies job applications instead of candy was merely out of my own self interest. This dog LOVES candy, and does not like to see my humans give it away on Halloween. I have been trying to get into candy since I was a little puppy, and believe me; I do not enjoy seeing it given to a bunch of little deadbeats just because they put on a cute costume--and some of the costumes aren't even cute. Some of them dress up as monsters and vampires! Sure, the fans of the Twilight movie series might be excited to see vampires at their door, but this dog is not a fan of them. The way I see it, vampires are villains. Of course, I am not only smart, but sane as well. If a vampire tries to bite this dog's neck, he will find that I have some sharp teeth myself, and I'm not afraid to use them if the "human" tries to bite me. Anyway, it is nice to get compliments from the Republicans that read my blog. I appreciate your kind comments.

For those members of the Tea Party who wrote, let me tell you that I am honored. However, you are a third party who does not really stand much of a chance so I will only get back to you if you win--this dog has napping to do and can't be taking risks with losers.

For those Democrats who wrote in defense of child labor laws and who told me that I am wrong, I can only add that I agree with them totally on dog labor laws. This dog is not about to mush in some race unless I am racing to Burger King, and I would prefer my BK be delivered. I am much too important to be going to get it myself. I do appreciate that your party watches out for us dogs, but I've been able to fend for myself since I was about 2 months old. Some of these human puppies who come to the door are over 3 years old and still can't take care of themselves. I was amazed at how long the human puppies get to mooch off their parents.

In response to the Green Party, if you would get rid of the birds as I have suggested many times, there wouldn't be any problems with the environment.

Now that I have covered the political agenda from all sides, it is time for my nap.

The only side this dog is taking is the side that lets me keep my candy!

Demon Flash Bandit (Genius Dog)

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