Saturday, October 23, 2010

Reading my Crystal Bone

As a special treat for my readers, I have decided to use my talent as Demon Flash Bandit, Psychic Dog, to predict the future. I looked into my Crystal Bone and these are the events that I saw come to pass.

1. The actress, Lindsey Lohan, will continue drug rehab for the rest of her life. I do not see a successful future career for her unless she can get roles involving being on drugs.

2. A new car will be manufactured that runs on coffee, and people will report that they have trouble getting it started in the morning.

3. Newspapers will be replaced by netbook computers which the paper boy will throw on people's roofs everyday--unless he decides to break a window.

4. Humans will finally declare war on birds.

5. Cats will actually act happy to see their owners as more of them are replaced by dogs due to the loyalty that dogs show to their humans.

6. In politics, the Tea Party will make tea.

7. Obamacare will be such a rousing success that the Republicans will start calling it Wcare, but it will make them look stupid because most of the humans will think it stands for Whocares.

8. Arnold Swarzen--however you spell his name-gubenator of California will be replaced by Kermit the Frog, and California's economy will improve.

9. The big sled race in Alaska, Iditarod, will have all the dogs following one of the lead dogs, Demon Flash Bandit, to Burger King's drive thru in Anchorage. I have to admit this one is cheating a bit since I have already decided to do this.

Now, you can sit back and wait for my skill as a psychic to be proven.

Demon Flash Bandit (Psychic Dog)

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