Why No Money From the Tooth Fairy for a Dog's Teeth?

Have any of my readers noticed that when a human puppy (child) loses a tooth, the child puts the tooth under their pillow? In the morning, the "tooth fairy" has come and got the tooth and left the child money in the tooth's place. The tooth fairy is one of those nice characters like the Easter Bunny or Santa Claus--you actually look forward to their visits. However, I have done some serious research on this topic, and when dogs lose teeth, no tooth fairy comes to give us money for our teeth. I'm not saying that there is no dog who doesn't get money from the tooth fairy, but I think it would be safe to say that 99.9% of dogs do not receive a visit from the tooth fairy. This made me wonder why we dogs get overlooked by the tooth fairy. My first theory was that it is because dogs don't tend to lose as many teeth as humans, but that should make it easier for the tooth fairy since she would have a lot less work to do. I am assuming the tooth fairy is a female because I don't think most men would want to spend their nights flying around leaving money for teeth. My apologies to any tooth fairies who might not be female--no offense is intended. I have never met a tooth fairy so I'm not expert on tooth fairyness. Anyway, since my first theory seems totally silly, I have developed another theory. I think the tooth fairy might be skipping dogs because the tooth fairy has a cat or bird and they aren't delivering the tooth fairy messages from the tooth fairy answering machine that lets the fairy know that a dog has lost a tooth. I think both cats and birds would think it is funny not to pass the messages on. If my second theory is true, then the tooth fairy would not be deliberately leaving dogs out---it would be a conspiracy among our enemies--the cats and birds. It even makes me wonder--is the tooth fairy actually a cat or bird? That could explain who is behind the idea of telling humans to brush their dog's teeth. Since teeth brushing is annoying to many of us dogs, they could help us keep our teeth which would ultimately save them money. I will continue my research into this subject, and I will keep my readers updated if I learn any new information. I haven't lost any teeth yet, but it would be nice to think that is I did, I would at least get some dingo bone money for my loss!

Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing the Tooth Fairy)