As a dog, I have decided that I need a new hobby because a dog needs to have something important to do with his time. I contemplated many activities that I could get involved with. I could do the usual things that many dogs like to do with their time---fetch, run, guard things, but I wanted something that set me apart so that I wouldn't be just like all the other dogs. I finally found the perfect hobby for me. I have learned to yap constantly in a high pitch yap that seems to go right for the humans' nerves. In fact, it gets on Angel Zoom Smokey's nerves if you do it long enough while she is trying to sleep, which is one of the most fun times to yap. She gets mad and snarls at me, and I keep right on yapping. It isn't just a hobby, it is a laugh riot. The reason it works so well is that normally, I am a very quiet dog, but I've found that if a quiet dog occasionally yaps for about 24 hours straight, it is so highly effective at getting a dog noticed, that is becomes a hobby for the dog. Don't get me wrong--I'm not talking about barking which is totally and completely different from yapping. Barking is something all dogs do on occasion, but yapping is a high pitched whine that I have perfected into an art form. I am also quite the trooper. I continue yapping even when it is bugging me. I think I will start the Demon Flash Bandit School of Yapping. I'm sure other dogs would love to have yapping as a cool hobby that they can enjoy too.
Demon Flash Bandit (Yapping at Everyone and Everything)