Demon Flash Bandit---Real Dog

If you attended the Toy Fair 2011, you might have run across Perfect Petzzz. These are dogs that look real and even breathe, but they are fake. This dog is annoyed that they are referred to as "perfect pets" If you ask this dog, this company is insulting dogs everywhere by calling fake dogs "perfect". Do these fake dogs have "accidents" in the house? Do they need to be walked? Do they need a doggy door? Do you have to let them go outside to "do their business"? Do they decorate the house with muddy paw prints? Do they bark when an intruder approaches your house? I could go on and on, but you get the idea. I think it is about time we dogs build a "perfect human", you know--one with a working brain. What is the point of a fake dog anyway? That dog won't jump around excitedly when you come home after being gone. A fake dog won't kiss you or clean the floor when you drop food. A fake dog won't keep you company when you are feeling depressed. A fake dog won't ride in the car with you with his head out the window. No self respecting dog has ever asked for a fake human because we know that fake humans are usually mannequins. Only dogs could build a fake human with a brain, and we aren't going to bother because it is a waste of our valuable nap time. I want to assure my readers that this blog is being written by an actual dog--not a fake dog. A fake dog would never be able to write a blog. Personally, I think this is a conspiracy among members of the royal family who have bribed a toy company to produce an exact replica of me to attend the royal wedding. I don't see the point because there is no way a fake dog at the royal wedding can pass as me. When the paparazzi notice that the dog isn't doing anything other than breathing, they are going to realize that the dog is a fake. In fact, what if it turns out to be an evil robot dog? It can happen. In the movie Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey, they had to deal with robots of themselves who they referred to as Evil Robot Us-es. Don't worry, Bo Obama is going to make sure there are some special secret service agents at the wedding just so they can make sure that an Evil Robot Demon Flash Bandit doesn't cause any mayhem. Only the real me is allowed to create mayhem.

Demon Flash Bandit (Real Dog)