Saturday, September 22, 2012
Bronx Zoo Cats Get Special Treat-- A Human
There was some excitement in the tiger area of the Bronx Zoo in New York City yesterday. One of the humans riding the monorail that allows zoo visitors to view the tigers decided to jump into the area with the tigers. The human is alive, and missing a foot. Any dog could have told him that jumping in with big cats is not a good idea. The little domestic house cats are annoying so the big ones are super annoying! I managed to use my credentials as a journalist to go to the Bronx Zoo and get an interview with one of the tigers that witnessed the event. I am going to use an assumed name so that "Tony" won't be incriminated for eating a human foot. You know how the humans can be, but this dog does not think the tigers did anything wrong since the human wasn't supposed to be there. Any human who does not understand that big cats are dangerous should not be allowed to visit a zoo. Before I start the interview: here is the link for the news item:
http://usnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2012/09/21/14017125-man-jumps-into-tiger-den-at-bronx-zoo-is-badly-mauled?lite
Tony: The zoo is Grrr..reat. I had to say that since you gave me the name of the cereal tiger, Tony.
Demon Flash Bandit: Yeah, that is why I chose that alias. Now I would like to ask...since you were there...what were you thinking when the human fell into your home?
Tony: My first thought was that the human had fallen out of an airplane, but I didn't observe any aircraft passing over at that particular moment.
Demon Flash Bandit: So it was a complete surprise when the human fell into your home?
Tony: Yes of course. I was just sitting there watching television, and then a human is sitting in front of my television set blocking my view which made me mad.
Demon Flash Bandit: What did you do:
Tony: I had just been thinking of going to the kitchen to get some snacks, and I thought I must be the world's luckiest cat because I had a snack falling into my home. I didn't even have to get up and prepare a snack for myself.
Demon Flash Bandit: Did the human taste good?
Tony: The human tasted okay, but he was a bit tough. I prefer the taste of a good barbequed bird.
Demon Flash Bandit: Whou could blame you...all us dogs like to eat birds too. I wish you well, Tony, and I hope you continue to get lots of tasty treats.
Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Journalist)
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What a dumb human!! He's lucky to be alive!! Maurice is da biggest cat I ever hope to come across!!
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