Saturday, November 3, 2012

Milkbone Standard

Since the presidential election is close at paw, I decided to use this blog to talk about something that is important to most of the humans--the economy.  As a presidential candidate, I'm sure that many of my readers are wondering how I would handle the economy.  If I am elected, there will be major changes, which I think will benefit everyone--both human and canine, and yes, even felines.  The humans have the money based on a "gold standard" which is quite silly since gold, although shiny and nice in jewelry, does not have any real purpose for survival.  We dogs refer to the gold standard as the "shiny standard" since, sadly, many of the humans are mesmerized by shiny things.  We dogs have more intelligence and sense so we don't really get excited over gold and/or silver.  Therefore, I would base the economy on the "Milkbone standard".  All transactions would be gauged over their worth in milkbones, and all food would have more value than metal.  This makes more sense because, next to oxygen and water, food is the next necessary item for survival.  It is even more important than shelter.  By the way, I would give Milkbone's marrow bones a higher value than regular milkbones because I think they are super delicious, and they have a Siberian Husky on the box. 
Of course, there are other issues-the most important of which is getting along with others.  The humans tend to get into fights with each other over really stupid stuff.    I would put an end to much of that by making sure that dogs of various humans take over and start running the household for the humans.  Then most arguments would involve food, and very little else-unless a couple of male dogs are fighting over a cute female.  Those arguments are solved very quickly without involving most of the world.  In fact, often the neighbors don't even know about the argument.
Now that I have summed up my opinions of various important political matters, I am going to stop writing and take a nap.  I also have a strong opinion that a dog needs to take a lot of naps.  I would pass laws to make napping necessary.  Some of the humans can really use a nap--they are so grouchy!

Demon Flash Bandit (My Political Opinions)

1 comment:

  1. We are in the 47% that gets it!

    PeeEssWoo: BLUE ROKHKS!