Say It With Dingo Bones

I'm sure most of us have heard the slogan, "Say it With Flowers". This is a slogan that is used by florists to encourage people to send flowers to other humans. Commercial advertising is always encouraging humans to buy things that the humans doing the advertising are in business to sell. Of course, most of this advertisement is geared toward humans because most dogs could care less what the ads are about. I use the slogan "say it with flowers" to prove that point. I have never heard that slogan, and had the urge to go and buy flowers for another dog--or a human either for that matter. If they wanted to get a dog's money, they would have to change the slogan to "say it with dingo bones". That would make sense to any dog who hears it. Don't get me wrong--dogs have nothing against flowers. We like to smell them, and we like to dig them up, but we would never waste our money sending them to another dog.

In fact, if the advertising industry wants to target dogs with their advertising, I have some suggestions for them to mention in their ads:

1. Burger King: This burger tastes good fresh or in the left in the refrigerator for weeks. (All dogs know this is true--we love to rescue disgusting food that the humans try to throw away.)

2. Milkbones: Bone shaped treats that taste like meat--what could be better?

3. Squeaky Toys: Your dog will love the noise this toy makes!

4. Dog Food: It looks and tastes like human food (that is the only way you will get a dog to try the stuff).

5. Dog Clothing: The big dogs won't laugh when you wear this. (It isn't true, but it is hard to prove they laughed in court.)

Of course, dogs are so much smarter than humans that there will have to be serious marketing to get past our obvious intelligence, but it might work on some of the dumber dogs.

Demon Flash Bandit (Say it With Dingo Bones)