Buy Me Some Peanuts and Cracker Jacks--I Like Food

I'd like to welcome my 2 new followers, Khyra and Kira. Kira's mom has some lovely sculptures on her site which my readers should enjoy checking out---I was very impressed with her talent. I like Khrya's Korner too-what can I say, dogs are wonderful! My pal, Turbo, might be in need of some campaign workers for his election. A dog can always use people to help when a political office is involved, and we need more dogs serving in the Senate and House.

Since spring is in the air, it is time to discuss a sport the humans like to play in the spring and summer which is called baseball. The humans play this game with a ball and a bat. To find out more about this game, I captured several bats so that I could interrogate them. The first bat seemed to know very little about baseball. He kept asking me if he could get in his coffin before the sun came up so I realized I had a vampire bat so I did what any self respecting dog would do to a creature with wings who reminds him of a bird--I put a stake through his little bat heart. That will teach him to fly around taking blood or snow or whatever vampire bats like to take. Then I found another bat, and that bat had to go too. He kept asking about robin so I knew he was in league with the birds since robins are birds. Just when I was about to give up, I finally got a normal bat, who told me that baseball is a human game and it is not played with bats that fly, but with bats that are actual "sticks" of wood". Just when I finally think I have found a helpful bat, I realize that he is talking gibberish. I finally had to turn to another dog for the information I needed and here it is:

Baseball is a game played with a ball and a bat. The humans throw the ball and try to hit the bat. If the bat is hit, the player who hit the bat then runs around a diamond (it must be a super big gem), and if he makes it "home", his team gets the point. If the bat is killed by the ball, the team gets a homer which means that they get the point faster for getting rid of the bat. Bats happen to be one flying bird type critter that most humans don't happen to like. The object of the game is to get more points than the other team, and preferably, kill as many bats as possible. I suppose that is why bats don't like to talk about the game. This game is played by kids in their neighborhoods, but there are also major league teams that have a big audience where they serve hot dogs, pizza, beer, etc. I think this explains why the game is popular with the humans. Even most of the humans like to eat. I think it is time for me to find out when the Detroit Tigers are playing so I can go have some food. We dogs know what is important in life!

Demon Flash Bandit (Explaining Baseball)