Mr. Barack Obama, President of the United States, has announced that NASA's new mission will be to go to an asteroid by the year 2025. One reason for this mission is to insure that, if an asteroid were to endanger the Earth, the humans would be able to stop it from destroying the planet.
White House sources (I'm not saying it is Bo Obama, First dog, but it "might be") say that Mr. Obama has been playing Aerosmith's "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" a lot around the White House in recent weeks. White House aides have confiscated all copies of the movie, Armageddon, a movie that has been watched a bit too much at the White House according to my source. I am not saying that this movie has anything to do with NASA's new mission, but I'm also not saying that it doesn't. It isn't that this dog can't understand the idea of wanting to kick some asteroid butt, but when are we going to start fighting the worst threat to the planet--the evil birds? I have written numerous times about the birds and their evil plans for world domination. Thanks to Bo Obama, the copies of Armageddon are being replaced with the "documentary" done by Alfred Hitchcock, The Birds. I feel confidant that war will be declared on birds as soon as possible once the President starts watching the documentary placed for his viewing by "our hero". The humans don't need to thank us dogs for our part in this happy ending--we know the fate of the world is in our paws---as usual. It is just all in a dog's day.
Demon Flash Bandit (Saving the World-As Usual)