I've had a busy morning turning down starring roles in major motion pictures. I had to explain to my agent that Demon Flash Bandit does not appear in a movie that this dog does not consider to be worthy of my talent. I actually had to block the calls from Sony. I've already told them that I will not appear in their new Spiderman remake. I think the whole idea is nuts, and it should be a sequel not a remake of a movie that I've already seen. However, the humans running Sony didn't take my advice so now I refuse to appear in any of their offerings mainly because I think they are stupid. I must also announce that I turned down Nike to be their spokesdog because this dog does not wear booties. They begged me to wear booties, and I had to tell them that this dog likes to feel the dirt under my paws. I happen to like dirt anyway. I think most dogs like dirt. Humans are the ones who seem to be terrified of dirt which I think is silly. They waste way too much time trying to fight dirt, and the dirt always wins in the long run. The humans may win the battle, but the dirt will win the war--you would think the humans would know this by now, but still they continue to fight dirt.
If the nice people at Arctic Paws want an endorsement, they have it. Yummy Chummies are wonderful. I got an order from them yesterday, and their treats deserve to be praised--not like Sony and Nike. Silly human companies--Sony and Nike don't make products a dog wants anyway so how do they stay in business?
Demon Flash Bandit (Busy Morning Enjoying Yummy Chummies)