Tuesday, April 27, 2010

How To Become a Successful Dog Artist

When I was a puppy, I got into some paint and painted my nose orange--yes just like the color I'm using for my blog today. The paint was non toxic craft paint so it didn't hurt me any, but my nose was orange for about a week. I might add that many people said I was adorable with an orange nose, which is a look that many humans just can't pull off. You might ask me what this story has to do with today's blog--it has everything to do with it. It shows that even as a puppy, I was interested in artistic expression, but I never thought I had the talent to be an actual artist until I saw some of the modern art in the museums. It was then that I realized that my dream of being an artist could be realized. I proceeded to buy a canvas and some paint. I put the canvas on the floor and then I dipped my paws into different color paint, and I then "painted" my modern art masterpiece.

For other dogs who think they might be interested in becoming artists, I have some advice for you which is particularly important for modern art masterpieces. It may look easy. It might even look like fun, but you do have to remember that there is more to it than just painting a canvas. I have to go to various art shows and events related to art, and I have to dress up--or dress like a bag dog--either extreme is okay. Then you have to give the impression that you disdain society in general, and are above it. Be sure and be critical as often as possible. Name the painting something philosophical so that the viewers will think the painting is representing something socially relevant. This is probably the most important thing to do---be sure and act like you are smarter than everyone else and that you hate to have to even bother to talk to anyone else. I have become so successful at modern art, that I bought some fake dog poop which I shaped into a cell phone, and I dubbed it, "the futility of communication". That little project should keep me in milkbones for several years. If you need any more advice on how to make it in the art world, just leave a comment. I'll do all I can to help you. I like to see others succeed too even though I can't admit that at art shows.

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Artist)

1 comment:

  1. Woooos! My secretary is so laughing.... she says woo certainly know woo art shows, so does she, she has been to sooo many she has lost count. She always said if she made crazy art in 5 minutes, and called it some high fluting name like "energy crisis bomb" she would be a famous artist by ow... in the meantime, maybe I could get my paws on some paint!
    ~husky kisses~
    -Kira The BeaWootiful