I was recently watching a car race, and I realized that what the race really needs is drivers like myself who are dogs. I happen to be an excellent driver--not like the stupid cat on Saturday Live named Toonses who is always driving off a cliff. You can't trust cats to drive a car. The real advantage to having dogs as race car drivers is that we are so handsome that we would make super great people to endorse the products that sponsor the race. Who could resist buying something when a dog is telling you that it is a great product? I know I couldn't. Therefore, it is about time the humans were replaced by dogs. We would make the races far more interesting to watch.
Demon Flash Bandit (Future Race Car Driver)