Saturday, June 25, 2011

A Dog Does Not Need Human Accompaniment!

It is Balloonfest Weekend here in Howell, Michigan which means that humans are full of more hot air than usual. (Dogs love that joke.) There are a lot of activities going on including a B52 fly over from the Yankee Air Force which is based in Ypsilanti, Michigan. I'm not quite sure why a band is flying over, but I hope they will be playing music because this dog enjoys music. I actually learned something about history because of the Balloonfest. Up until today, I had no idea that either side had airplanes during the Civil War. Obviously there were airplanes because that is why it is called the Yankee Air Force. There is also a Confederate Air Force (based in Texas) so that must have been the first war to use airplanes. I am so glad that I can use my blog to entertain and teach serious history lessons too. This is why my readers are so smart!

I live within a mile of the Festival grounds so I am hoping that one of the balloons will land in my yard. I've got an anti-aircraft gun on my deck to "help" any balloon that might fly over decide to land here. I heard that when a hot air balloon lands in some one's yard, they have to give the humans a bottle of champagne, but I'm going to demand Bowser Beer instead. I want to try it, and so far, my humans have not ordered any for me so this is my chance! Normally, I don't approve of guns, but I have to assume that shooting at a balloon doesn't count since they aren't alive.

My humans used to go to the Balloonfest every year, but now it is too much walking for Mommy. This is the disadvantage of having older humans because they can't do as much as the younger ones. The advantage is that they usually spend more time with a dog! Angel Zoom Smokey knows how to work the system around here. The last time Mommy was sick and in bed, that rascal was getting 3 hour tummy rubs. I warned Mommy that Angel was going to be spoiled. Do the humans listen? All us dogs know they don't. Yes, Angel Zoom Smokey is one SPOILED dog!

Anyway, there is a bunch of stuff going on at the Festival including an arts and crafts show. There are people selling dog related items so I think I should be allowed to go there without the humans and look around. We dogs like to shop too! It wouldn't be any trouble for the humans. I can walk or drive myself. I happen to be a better driver than 75% of the human drivers on the road. I admit that the human drivers can hold up their middle fingers when they signal, and we dogs have trouble doing that, but I think I could learn to hold up a middle claw. If that is too difficult, I can get a fake hand to use when necessary.

I have to go now. It is time to sit out on the deck to "watch for the balloons. HAHAHAHAHA

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Wants to Attend the Local Balloonfest!)

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