I was unable to get to blogspot to post my blog yesterday so this made me think that the government has started a conspiracy to keep dogs from posting blogs since we are so much smarter than the humans. I started wondering why the govt. would be so concerned about what I have to say. Then I looked over my past blogs, and realized that they are probably concerned about my rules for training the humans. Can I help it if humans need to be taught dog obedience as soon as possible? I think they are worried about the "not giving a dog a bath without signed and notarized permission from the dog" rule. It seems that I have talked to many dogs and the humans have been giving them unauthorized baths without the necessary permission! Yes, I was upset when I learned this. Now those dogs know their rights, and will be able to put a stop to baths in the future. I suppose that is why the humans don't want dogs to read my blog---they want dogs to live in ignorance so they can continue bathing a dog without consequences.
I don't know if I'm the only one who has wondered about this, but what do fish learn in fish school? When you have more than one fish, the fish is in a school. I guess this is because fish must be super smart creatures who love to learn. However, when you see a bunch of fish together, how do you know who the teacher happens to be? Is it the fish with the paycheck? Do fish teachers have college degrees hanging on a rock for the other fish to see? Does the teacher walk around with a laser pointer? I guess it doesn't really matter if I know who the teacher is as long as the fish know. When they are swimming around in school, are they going on field trips? Is a sunken treasure ship a museum field trip? Do the fish in aquariums stare at the humans watching them and then laugh hysterically at how funny the humans are? I know it is an amusing topic among dogs when we get together. One of my pals the other day was telling me how his human actually thinks that he is in charge. All us dogs were cracking up over that one. To quote a line from the movie, Good Boy--"you don't see us picking up their poop". Truer words have never been spoken--dogs are in charge for that reason.
Demon Flash Bandit (Conspiracy Theory and Fish School)