After enduring some cutbacks in salary, Queen Elizabeth II (my good pal, the Queen Lady) is going to get extra money this year. According to what I read on the Internet, she will get 58 million dollars this year although in England, you have to switch them to pounds. I think the people in the United States have never referred to our money as pounds because they like money, but most are on diets trying to avoid pounds. I am very pleased for the Queen Lady. Now she will no longer have to do odd jobs around London in order to keep up her lifestyle of wearing those silly hats the royal family seems to be so fond of donning. I happen to have a Davy Crockett hat that my Daddy bought me so I would look "cute"-like a raccoon could be cuter than a dog! I hate wearing hats and would gladly ship it to the royal family at no cost to them so that they can look like frontier royal raccoons. I have to admit that it is nice that the Queen Lady can cut back on the work so that she can spend more time with the royal baby which is going to arrive soon. By the way, that Davy Crockett hat would probably be just the right size for a baby since it is dog size, and the baby could start out with wierd hats from the beginning.
You may think I'm making light of raising a royal baby versus a regular human baby, but there is a big difference. The royal baby has to learn all sorts of protocol when meeting heads of states and other royal babies. They have to have special toys that have heads that come off so that they can fully understand the meaning of the royal command, "off with the head". This was a command of which King Henry VIII was very fond. I suppose when he was running England, there were a lot of human running around with heads that shouldn't have had them...and he was married to several of them. I could go on and on, but I'm sure all the dogs reading this are familiar with the difference in humans and human royalty. Human royalty have an important job to do for the world. When I find out what it is, I'll let you know!
Demon Flash Bandit (Regular, Not Royal Dog)