Today's blog is a public service message for my doggy pals reading this. From time to time, some of the humans think that they need to go on vacation. Fortunately for me, my humans take me with them; but there are some humans who think it is okay to put a dog in doggy jail (which they refer to as a "kennel"), while they leave the area and have a good time. How they can have a good time without their dog or dogs is beyond me. Most of them don't have the sense to have a good time on their own. This is the purpose for my blog today--to let other dogs know how to deal with this situation.
When the humans go on vacations, they take suitcases with them because the humans are always taking baths or showers and changing clothes. Yeah, we dogs think it is a big waste of time and water, but again, you are dealing with humans and they will never have the genius of the average dog. Even the human "geniuses" often use that "genius" to build bombs and other things that hurt and kill other humans and pets. If you ask me, if a person is truly a genius, he or she should be making the world a better place--not a worse place. But I digest (okay--it is really digress, but I prefer to digest because that involves food in my tummy). I need to get back to my original topic which is, how to go with the humans without them knowing about it. You wait until they pack their suitcases (and make sure they buy one that will fit you, the dog, comfortably and that is not air tight because you need to breathe. Once the suitcase is packed, toss the clothing and stuff in the garbage, and put in some prepared food and water, and then climb in yourself. You can even leave a couple of clothing items to lay on if you need some extra comfort. Then nap until you get to the destination. Most of us dog have no problem napping for several days so that travelling part is easy. When the humans get to their destination, imagine their happiness when they open the suitcase and see that the family dog is with them. Sure, some of them may get a little upset that they have no change of clothing, but who cares? As I said earlier, the humans bathe too much and change clothes way too often, and it is a vacation so they are supposed to be having a good time. Ask most dogs, and few of them will tell you that having a bath is having a good time. Most of us hates baths! Therefore, we are also showing the humans how to enjoy life--and the humans need that. Most of them spend way too much time at some stupid place called work.
Demon Flash Bandit (How To Go On Vacation With the Humans)