Mommy bought reindeer antlers for my stunt dog, Phantom Fast Snowman. Phantom has to do all the annoying stunts that I don't like to do-like wearing costumes and hats. I say if a dog is supposed to have antlers, we would have been born with them! The humans get such ridiculous ideas! For example, just last night, I was licking my paw. I kept licking it until it was bleeding. I wasn't complaining, but my human saw it, and immediately told me to quit licking it. Then she sprayed some stuff on it to make it taste bad so that I would quit licking it. Do the humans never learn? Of course, I continued licking my paw. No silly flavor is going to stop me from doing something I want to do. I'm not licking it now because I'm not in the mood to lick it, but if I were, you can be sure I would be licking it to my heart's content. I happen to think the humans should sit back and let a dog do what a dog has got to do!
I've got to go now. I suspect there are Christmas gifts hidden around here someplace for me and I need to go and sniff them out. There is really no need to wait until Christmas to enjoy a present!
Demon Flash Bandit (Dog)