Not Attending Flea Circus

I was recently invited to a flea circus-an invitation that got an immediate, no. Why would I want to see a flea circus when I hate fleas? I have yet to meet a dog who likes them. They are annoying creatures who annoy dogs and other species, including humans. They caused the bubonic plague many centuries ago, and I know they did it out of pure spite. Have you ever talked to a flea? I have, and they are truly obnoxious. They jump around thinking they are the most talented creatures in the universe because they can bite dogs and people. This is not something that I consider a talent. They are parasites and should be treated as such. Sure, you will meet one or two that are nice (for fleas anyway), but they can't be trusted. There is always one or two who are smarter than the rest and try not to act as obnoxious in an effort to have you let down your guard so they can snack on you. When you see a flea, kill it. It does not deserve to live so get rid of it. Be sure you don't attend any flea circuses. Those fleas are already full of themselves. If they think they are stars, they will be worse. No dog wants to deal with a super snobby flea!

Demon Flash Bandit (Not a Flea Fan)

Movie Review: Prometheus

Today I am going to do a movie review of Prometheus, which is the reason I did not get to write a blog yesterday. I was busy going to the theatre. Before I get into the movie review, the film company ran this horror movie "short" that has a man and he turns into a bird. My regular readers who know my thoughts on birds, can imagine how scary that was for me. I almost got up and left the theatre, but I stayed because I know how much my readers depend on my movie reviews. Prometheus is the prequel to the movie, Alien, which came out many years ago. It is about a couple of historians and scientists who think that aliens came to Earth years ago, and left an invitation for the humans to come and see them. Personally, I think they were silly because if they had the advanced technology and they had helped to create the humans, you would think they would stop in and see what is going on with them, or maybe they aren't around anymore. Either way, this dog would not waste time and money going to see them. Of course, if the characters in the movie thought that way, there would be no movie so they didn't see it the way I do. Anyway, they made it to the destination, and you'll have to watch the movie to see what happens when they get there. I really don't care if this spoils the movie or not, but I do have to give out one spoiler alert. After all the money, time and trouble to get there, they found that the line in drive thru at McDonalds was even longer than the ones on Earth. All that way for a fast food meal and they still had to wait. This caused a lot of tension among the characters in the movie.

I give this movie a tail wag and a couple of paws up which is about a 6 out of 10 on the human movie scale. Considering that I hated the Alien movie, then that is actually a stellar rating from me. I hope everyone has a nice weekend!

Demon Flash Bandit (Movie Reviewer)

I Didn't Attend the Royal Wedding

Since I chose not to attend the royal wedding, I also chose not to watch it. I do have a letter to share with you from the Queen Lady regarding my lack of attendance.

Dear Demon Flash Bandit,
The royal wedding of my grandson yesterday went well, but it would have been so much better if you had attended. We never realized that when we didn't invite Bo Obama, first dog, that you would take offense and not attend. We were so looking forward to you because, as you know, you were our most important guest. The media was very upset when they asked where you would be sitting, and we had to tell them that you had declined our invitation. I have to admit that I didn't expect you to decline the invitation since most people will not turn down a royal invitation, but we failed to take into consideration you would stand by your fellow dog, Bo. I do hope that we can continue to be friends because being your friend means a lot to me and my family.
Love, Queen Lady Elizabeth

For those who want to know what I replied, I am going to include my reply.

Dear Queen Lady,
I do appreciate the wedding invitation, and I am glad that it went well. I would have attended had you included Bo Obama, but when you omit the first dog, then as a patriotic American dog, I cannot in good conscience attend the event. I understand that the wedding would have been a lot better had I been there, but this is something you should have realized before you omitted Bo Obama.

Actually, I'm surprised the royal family has even managed to survive all these years what with all the inbreeding in past generations. Some people in the United States do that, but they usually don't get the opportunity to run the country. Sure, sometimes they are allowed to run a fast food franchise or a gas station, but seldom the entire country. Judging from the success of recent royal marriages, it even takes the "fairy tale" out of the equation since, in fairy tales, the couple lives happily ever after--not divorced. I will admit that I never realized what a rich country Britain happens to be until I saw how much money your family has to live on. I have to tell you that you wouldn't like the welfare system here in the United States because the tax payers won't allow a family to draw so much money from the government. Kudos to your welfare system there.
Don't worry about us being friends. I'm glad that you understood why I could not attend the royal wedding, and I do hope the couple will be very happy together. Happiness doesn't seem to be too prevalent in your family which is very sad.
Love, Demon Flash Bandit