Another Injustice to Dogs!

Normally, I am not a fan of birds, and I am constantly warning all my readers that birds are evil creatures who cause global warming by stealing snow. However, my hatred of birds does not apply to penguins largely because these birds don't steal snow because they live in areas with lots of snow and they love snow as much as I do. They are also cute and I love the way they waddle around when they are on land. There is a website set up by Disney that is called Club Penguin. I assume it is for children. I am not a member, but evidently, when you join, you can play games and generally have fun on the site. There is a membership fee and since I'm not a member, I have no idea if the site is worth the cost, but this dog does love all the lovely snow on the site. My big question is why is there no game site for dogs? I'd consider joining a husky club or a dog club. It could have games like "chase the squirrel", and "find the treasure in the garbage". Sure, it would be more fun actually doing those things, but when a dog is stuck in the house and can't enjoy chasing a squirrel in person, it would be a fun alternative. I think dogs are often left out of fun activities like that because the humans think we aren't intelligent enough to be on the computer. Excuse me, but how many children can write a blog like I am writing and yet they have sites for them. All us dogs know that it takes human children a long time to even learn to walk and yet dogs are treated like we aren't smart. It is an injustice against dogs as usual, and this dog has to bark out about such injustices!

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Blogger)

Underwater Treasure from the Atocha

There is another story on the Internet about treasure being found, but this time it is from a ship that has already provided a lot of treasure. Mel Fisher and his crew located the Spanish ship, the Atocha, and they are continuing to find treasure from that ship. Much of the treasure can be seen at the Mel Fisher Maritime Museum in Key West, Florida. My humans have never been to his actual museum, but they have seen some of the treasures which were brought to the Detroit Boat Show years ago, and they were very interesting. It is nice that the humans are willing to go to such lengths for treasure. I don't mind digging for treasure. Since I'm a dog, I actually enjoy digging, but if it is underwater, this dog is not going after it. I do not like to get wet. I'm sure some dogs don't mind, but I'm not one of them. Anyway, it is nice that some of the humans don't mind getting wet to get a treasure. I hate to have to write this, but the humans will get wet just to take a bath. I know-I don't understand why they do it either, but they do. Most of them even have rooms in their homes dedicated to getting wet and clean. This is why dogs have trouble understanding humans. Just when they get some dirt on them and look and smell interesting, they go and wash it all away. The worst part is when they think a dog should get a bath too. Just because they want to be miserable is no reason to drag a dog into their own personal hell. However, this blog is not about the humans odd obsession with cleanliness, but about a treasure. For those who are unfamiliar with the Atocha, I suggest you look it up on the Internet. That is the smart way to view it--and to stay dry at the same time.

Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing Treasure)

Buried Treasure!

Brian Dyer of Lakeland, Florida decided to have a swimming pool installed in the back yard of his home. Imagine his surprise when he found that his home was built over a lot of garbage that wasn't supposed to be there. He is very upset since the cost of clean up is going to be very expensive. If Brian Dyer happened to be a dog instead of a human, this would have been a lucky thing for him. A dog would be thrilled to find garbage like that when we are digging a hole. Most dogs only dream of finding a treasure of that calibre when digging. I have heard dogs talk of treasures hidden by such well known pirates such as Blackfur, Francis Dalmatian, and of course, the very well known, Captain Jack Schnauzer (no pirate should have a bird's name). Dogs for generations have searched for their treasures--milkbones, rawhides, etc. However, Dyer has found the mother lode of treasure and he wasn't even looking for it. How lucky can a man get? Of course, being human, instead of being happy with his find, he is complaining about it and talking about cleaning it up. The humans are way too preoccupied with cleaning. All us dogs think they would be happier if they learned to embrace dirt as a way of life. It is a lot more fun than cleaning all the time.

Mommy went to see the movie, Green Lantern yesterday, and she enjoyed it. I will be writing a review of it on my brother's website, http://www.silverscreenhub.com/ . Don't bother to read what the human critics say about the movie. You always get a more accurate account of the movie from a dog.

Demon Flash Bandit (Argh Argh--that is Pirate Talk)

Digging for Treasure

I wonder how many of my readers saw the story about the man in Vienna, Austria who found buried treasure when he was digging in the back yard. How many times have I heard the humans complain about their dogs digging in the yard? Don't they realize the dog is just searching for buried treasure. We know that there are lots of interesting items just waiting to be discovered. In the case of the story from Austria, their department in charge of national antiquities is evaluating the find. From what I read, the items were about 650 years old, and consist of rings, brooches, ornate belt buckles, etc. Of course, I'm sure if the man has a dog, the dog was highly disappointed with that treasure. To a dog, that is not a treasure. When a dog digs for treasure, he is looking for good stuff like bones, sticks, and other interesting objects. The humans are so easy to please. If they find a shiny item, they are so happy. My theory is that most often it is their dog who finds the buried treasure, but then lets the human have it because the dog knows it has no use. You can't enjoy chewing on a gold ring so what is the point of having it? For the humans reading this, next time your dog is digging a hole in the yard, thank the dog for doing so. Who knows? He just might dig up a "treasure" that you will love even though he knows it is useless.

Demon Flash Bandit (Dogs Dig for Useful Things)

Bark Like a Pirate?

Ahoy. I have told Angel Zoom Smokey to put on her Halloween Pirate costume in honor of Talk Like a Pirate Day. So far, she has threatened to issue some puppy slaps of justice for the suggestion, and she told me to wear it myself. Since I do not want to wear it, I suppose there is going to be a limited amount of Pirate Partying around here unless Angel drinks too much grog, in which case, I might be able to trick her into wearing it. I am not counting on it since Angel is not an easy dog to fool.

To help my readers enjoy the holiday, there are actually websites that help you talk like a pirate, and everyone knows how serious a topic has to be before there is a website about it. However, I could not find one website with instructions on how dogs can bark like a pirate dog. Also, do dogs dress up in a pirate's hat and are there other things a pirate dog is expected to wear? How does a dog carry a sword around with him. I'm assuming that a dog can be the Captain of a ship if he chooses to do so. In fact, I think I have a great name for a pirate to have: Captain Demon Flash Bandit, pirate. It does have a very piratey sound to it, don't you think? I bet spell check is going to tell me that pirately is not a word. When it does, I will take out my sword and kill spell check and thus, prove I am a worthy pirate. I'm sure pirates in the old days used to keep the computers in line (or on line---they seem like the kind of people who would be on Twitter) on their ships. I'm sharing an old pirate tweet with you from the old days:
Me just commandeered a ship which me thought would bring a vast array of treasure, but alas, the booty from the ship was not what me expected. Me should have known that a ship flying under the "mouse" flag might not have been a good choice, but even a pirate captain has bad days every now and then. How was me supposed to know that Disney had a cruise ship for senior citizens? The complaints alone were enough to make me want to jump into the ocean and join Davy Jones in his locker. Where is the Cracken when you need it? Young people tend to shut up and do what they are told, but me supposes older people will take the risk and tell you off. Perhaps they don't feel they have as much to live for as the younger ones. Ten old ladies hit me over the head with their purses, and if me sees one more photo of the grandchildren, me will scream. The old men can't hear anything you tell them. I've had 24 of them attack me with their canes--and me thought the canes were for dancing. My crew has confiscated the electric scooters and they are driving them around the ship. Me thinks they are about to mutiny because the novelty of the electric scooters is wearing thin. Me thinks me will let the people go back to their ship, and then lock me-self into me quarters until this whole mutiny idea is over. Even Pirate Captains can have some very, very bad days! Next time, me will be more careful about the ships I commandeer. ---Captain Blue Eyed Husky

I do hope those who choose to participate enjoy talk like a pirate day. For those dogs who know how to bark like a pirate, start a website. I know that humans only have websites about things that are very important, but I think dogs would appreciate knowing how to bark like a pirate. The humans would never start a website just to entertain other humans, would they?

I hope everyone has a nice weekend, and if you find any spare pirate treasure in your back yard that you don't want, let me know. A dog can always use treasure...hopefully someone will find some dingo bones. They are so tasty!

Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing Talk Like a Pirate Day)