Interplanetary Outsourcing

For those of you who saw the item on the Internet news about the UFO seen over China, which is just the latest in a string of sightings, I am here to put every one's mind at ease on the subject. As many humans living in the United States are well aware, many jobs that used to be done here are being outsourced to China, India, and other small nations around the world because the people in those countries are willing to work for cheaper wages. China has become one of the main places where those jobs are shipped. Do you really think space aliens wouldn't hear about it while they are hanging around our atmosphere out in space? The UFOs are carrying corporate representatives from their planet to negotiate having their products made in China. They even have alien transportation methods so that shipping will be a cinch--they can just teleport the objects back to their planet. The next time you see a report about a UFO over China, don't worry about it. You know it is just an alien corporation trying to save money on production costs. I refer to it as Interplanetary Outsourcing.

I will admit that not all the UFOs are here with corporate representatives. Some of them, particularly those seen in other countries, are here to try one of our Earth restaurants. If they had any sense, they would be at Burger King, home of the Whopper. You can't get any better food than a delicious burger from Burger King. I have been eating them since I was a puppy, and I might add that Burger King had the good sense to get the rights to use children's meal toys from Marmaduke and Cats and Dogs II. Great burgers and good taste in toy products--what more can you ask for from a restaurant? If I happen to see an alien when I go to Burger King, I'll say hello from everyone. It is always a good idea to make a good impression on strangers.

Demon Flash Bandit (Interplanetary Outsourcing)

Must See Movie. Cats and Dogs: Revenge of Kitty Galore

Mommy went to see a movie yesterday; and of course, there was no problem with deciding which movie to see: it was Cats and Dogs 2: The Revenge of Kitty Galore. I would have liked to review this movie for my readers, but I was unable to because dogs are not allowed in theatres. I ran for President in 2008 to end this type of discrimination against dogs, but as my pals are well aware, the election was rigged in favor of the humans. My dog pals had to bring a pencil to write in my name--they left it off the ballots---can you believe it? However, the constant discrimination against myself and my fellow dogs is a topic for another blog. I know my readers want to know how the movie turned out. The plot of the movie was that one rogue cat agent, Kitty Galore, came up with an evil plan to make dogs and humans lose their bond of love. The other cats then teamed up with dogs to stop Kitty Galore because cats love their humans as much as dogs do even if many of them don't like to show it. There was also a pigeon. I think he was dinner for the cats after the filming---at least that is what this dog is going to believe. I think birds were created to be dinner. Anyway, it is a good movie for the humans who like dogs and cats. (By the way, dogs and Cats would have been a better title.) I look forward to seeing this movie when it comes out on DVD or blu ray. I think the humans should spring for the blu ray. We dogs are so good looking that hi def is always a good plan.

Demon Flash Bandit (Movie Critic)

Demon Flash Bandit: Movie Critic

Is it already time for another blog posting? Does the Internet not realize that a dog has better things to do with his time? I'm sitting here at the computer writing when there are dog butts that I could be sniffing. I have always said that the humans would be fooled a lot less often by other humans is they practiced smelling the other humans' butts when they meet. It works for us dogs.

Angel Zoom Smokey and myself settled in with Mommy yesterday to watch the movie, Observe and Report, and this dog has to admit that this is one movie that I'm glad dogs weren't allowed into the theatre to see. Mommy watched the whole thing and said she didn't like it. Angel Zoom Smokey and myself bailed after about half an hour. I would much rather have a bath than be forced to waste my time watching such a bad movie.

On the subject of movies, this dog has decided that I should be hired as a movie critic. To my knowledge, there are no other dogs who are movie critics. The really great part of my plan is that no theatre could refuse to allow me in to see a movie if I am a critic. If only I had thought of this in time to see Cats and Dogs 2: The Revenge of Kitty Galore. I've seen the trailers and this looks like it is the best movie of the year up until now.

Demon Flash Bandit (Movie Critic)