Plant Bacon--Not Tomatoes!

This is most dreadful time of year for a dog because it is when the "tomatoes" start to ripen. Most of the time, they ripen without incident, but for the humans who made the mistake of planting the "killer" variety, it is one of the scariest times of the year. Despite the 3 documentary films which Hollywood has put out on the subject, the humans have still not learned to make sure that they aren't planting the kind that "attack". Now the problem has gotten worse thanks to a new variety of tomatoes that attack, and they are also zombie tomatoes. The last thing I want is to be attacked by a tomato who becomes a zombie that decides to start chasing you! I don't know why the humans even bother to plant tomatoes anyway when I would be planting something tastier like bacon. In fact, listen to my advice, and next year, plant bacon...don't even bother with planting anything other than bacon. You can thank me next year when you are enjoying some delicious bacon from your garden! Demon Flash Bandit