Do Not Burn a Dog's Bacon--If You Want to Keep Your Job"

Today is a sad blog for me to write. As it turns out, I am going to have to go the McDonalds restaurant which is located on East Grand River Avenue in Howell, MI and apply for a job as a manager. I know that my readers are all thinking, "no, Demon, you shouldn't have to work at a fast food place when you should be staying at home napping or at the very least running the company. The problem with running the company is that I have to get a job at the local level because the unthinkable happened yesterday! I got my usual 2 quarter pounders with bacon and they BURNED the bacon. Yes, the best part of the hamburger and those incompetent employees managed to mess up the order. This is why I have to take a management job at the local level so I can fire the incompetent employees who burned my bacon. This was not only an insult to my taste buds, but why would fast food take longer to burn my bacon when serving it unburned would be "faster"? I know some of you might be thinking, "Demon, you could give the workers a break since they are humans, and a dog can't expect much from humans. However, I think it is wrong to hold the humans to a lower standard just because they aren't dogs. In my opinion, this is why there are so many mistakes made by the humans. We dogs are letting them get by with inferior work ethics just because of their humanity. I will admit that all of this could be avoided if Mommy had just complained, but she refused to complain because the burgers were for a dog.....doesn't that make them getting the order correct even more important? Hopefully, I'll still have time for my blog while I'm working at the "burger mines". I think it will only take me a day or two to take care of the burned bacon situation so that I can quit and get back to relaxing. Demon Flash Bandit (Dog Who Does Not Enjoy Burned Bacon)