The Dog is Watching the Sheep!

Today I am going to examine a "fairy tale" that many human children have heard over the years. The tale is that of a shepherd boy who continues going back to his village to tell the villagers that a wolf is after the sheep. Of course, this is not true, but when a wolf finally does come and attack the herd, no one in the village believes him so his lies hurt his credibility when it was important for the other humans to believe him. I guess some of the humans never learn that it is best to be honest with others. Of course, I am not fond of the fairy tales that make the wolf the villain. I think our cousins, the wolves, aren't really scary animals at all. As usual, the humans get paranoid and scare easily. Here is the real version of the story which you know is true because it is the version as told by us dogs.

There was once a young boy who was a shepherd. He was watching the sheep, but he got bored and decided to cause a bit of trouble to liven things up a bit. He went to the village and told everyone that a wolf was bothering the sheep. It was not a wolf at all, it was a German Shepherd dog who was doing a better job watching over the sheep than the boy ever could. When the villagers saw it was a dog, they told the boy he was stupid and laughed and laughed at how dumb he was. You might ask, what happened to that boy when he grew up? He went into politics. Obviously, his job as a shepherd prepared him well. I'm not sure, but I think he said something about going to a tea party so I guess politics is much more fun than watching sheep. He even gets to attend political parties.

Demon Flash Bandit (Boy Who Cried Wolf Over a Dog)

The True Story of Little Red Riding Hood

Today I am going to tell the story, Little Red Riding Hood, from Grimm's fairy tales the way it was actually written. Some of the humans changed the story over the years, and I think it is time the original story was revealed.

Once upon a time there was a little girl who wore a red cape. She was a horrible, badly behaved little girl whose Mother sent her to visit her grandmother because she was sick of putting up with her. Her mother was hoping that Little Red Riding Hood would get lost in the forest and never find her way back. Her teachers had the same philosophy as her mother. They sent her to her mother hoping she would never find her way back to school.

On the way to her grandmother's house, she met a handsome dog ( a Siberian husky like myself). She thought he was a wolf because Little Red Riding Hood was not only a brat, but she was also quite stupid. She told the dog she was lost and the wonderful, well behaved dog helped her find the way to her grandmother's house. When she got to Grandma's house, she pulled the chain saw out of her basket. Luckily some kind hunters saw the girl ready to kill her grandmother (I told you she was a brat.) and they shot the little girl, and everyone lived happily ever after.

I think it is important to relate the true story of Little Red Riding Hood because wolves have gotten a lot of bad press over the years while jerks like Little Red Riding Hood, who happen to be the real villains, get by with everything.

The moral to this story is: Avoid children, spend more time with wolves and dogs.

Today I announce the winner of the Siberan Husky Christmas ornament. It is Khyra. Contact me at my email, demonflashbandit@gmail.com so that I can arrange shipment.

Demon Flash Bandit (Narrator)