I Did Not Attend the Comic Con Because it was Stupid

My human brother, Jeff, and I went to the ComicCon in Novi, Michigan yesterday, and I was not allowed in because I'm a Dog! I was wearing my red Superdog cape, and I looked quite handsome if I do say so myself. I even winked at the admission ticket humans with my gorgeous blue eyes. Imagine my anger when they would not allow me to enter the event. We huskies are a stubborn breed so I didn't give up easily. I tried several times to make my way into the event. I told them I was Dylan Dog, but they didn't believe me. They told me Dylan Dog was not a dog. I told them I was one of the huskies from Marmaduke and I was told that Marmaduke was a dog who would not be allowed to enter either. I even bandaged my paws, and rode in a wheelchair hoping for the "sympathy" entrance, but that didn't work either. What a bunch of stupid human jerks!!! They allowed humans dressed as Storm Troopers and Artoodetoo into the ComicCon. I guess space aliens and robots are okay, but dogs are not. Who makes up these stupid rules anyway? When a world famous blogger like myself isn't allowed to enter, I'm surprised they have any celebrities that people want to see. Don't they realize that they could make a fortune getting 10% of the money I get for my pawtographs? It is their loss. I decided to head for Burger King to get a couple of burgers. Bacon on the burgers will help soothe my hurt feelings. I wouldn't be surprised if the humans running the ComicCon refused to allow bacon to be served. This is what happens when stupid humans are put in charge of things.

Demon Flash Bandit (Not Attending the ComicCon)

The True Story of Little Red Riding Hood

Today I am going to tell the story, Little Red Riding Hood, from Grimm's fairy tales the way it was actually written. Some of the humans changed the story over the years, and I think it is time the original story was revealed.

Once upon a time there was a little girl who wore a red cape. She was a horrible, badly behaved little girl whose Mother sent her to visit her grandmother because she was sick of putting up with her. Her mother was hoping that Little Red Riding Hood would get lost in the forest and never find her way back. Her teachers had the same philosophy as her mother. They sent her to her mother hoping she would never find her way back to school.

On the way to her grandmother's house, she met a handsome dog ( a Siberian husky like myself). She thought he was a wolf because Little Red Riding Hood was not only a brat, but she was also quite stupid. She told the dog she was lost and the wonderful, well behaved dog helped her find the way to her grandmother's house. When she got to Grandma's house, she pulled the chain saw out of her basket. Luckily some kind hunters saw the girl ready to kill her grandmother (I told you she was a brat.) and they shot the little girl, and everyone lived happily ever after.

I think it is important to relate the true story of Little Red Riding Hood because wolves have gotten a lot of bad press over the years while jerks like Little Red Riding Hood, who happen to be the real villains, get by with everything.

The moral to this story is: Avoid children, spend more time with wolves and dogs.

Today I announce the winner of the Siberan Husky Christmas ornament. It is Khyra. Contact me at my email, demonflashbandit@gmail.com so that I can arrange shipment.

Demon Flash Bandit (Narrator)