Service Dogs

My mom  was visited by a dog named Alpine; and, of course, Alpine made her day.  I want to take this opportunity to thank all the dogs who visit hospitals, nursing homes, and hospice to visit the patients therein.  These dogs give selflessly of their love and time to bring snowshine (sled dogs love snowshine) into the  humans' lives.  A few dogs might be jealous, but a family dog cannot be everywhere at the same time so God created therapy dogs.  They provide companionship when the family dog is unavailable.  In addition, let me not forget to thank the humans who accompany those dogs.  Perhaps one day the dogs who are sick can be visited by service humans.

Demon Flash Bandit (Thankful Dog)

I Want an Ice Rink

I have been "pawrusing" some of those magazines that have all the fabulous homes, This is when I realized that the house I am living in is not up to par (golf term: not up to partying).  I don't know what my humans ate doing with their money, but the house I am living in is not fabulous.  It is just a modest middle class house, and my humans seem happy with it.  However, I don't think it is good enough for a dog of my station in life.  I love my humans so I have offered them a compromise.  They can build on a big room with an ice rink for Angel and me.  We would both be happy with that addition, and it should cost no more than $50,000. That seems to be a fair compromise to us.

Demon Flash Bandit (I Love Ice)

Education is Important

Autumn has arrived and that brings apples, pumpkins, and the beginning of school.  This concerns many parents who wonder if public school is the best option or if homeschooling is a better option.  For parents who are pondering this question, you have come to the right place for answers.  Send the human puppies to school.  Let me explain my reasoning behind this statement.

Everyone knows that a dog is a child's best teacher, but it is enough responsibility being the family dog.  We shouldn't have to teach the human puppies..  When the children are in school, it gives the dog a chance to nap.  Let the teachers do what they are trained to do.  Let the family dog sleep.

Demon Flash Bandit (Smart Dog)

I Am Pro Bacon

The WiFi was down at the nursing home for almost a week so mom was unable to type my blog for me. I think it is a conspiracy among the humans to keep me from barking before the election.  I understand their reluctance since the humans are running behind me in all the polls.  Angel Zoom Smokey has agreed to be my vice presidential running mate.  I had to ask her because she whined to mom, and mom told me I have to include her.  Angel is not participating in the vice presidential debate.  She has some important chewing to do here at home. Voters can see she has her priorities straight.

I am sure my are wondering what is on my mind today.  As usual, I thought about bones and bacon.. I enjoyed watching the Farmers insurance commercial with the synchronized swimming dogs.  I thought about bacon some more.  Then I took a nap and dreamed I was eating bacon which made it a very good dream.  I have decided that if aliens have arrived on this planet, they came for our bacon which also explains why it cost more now.  They have increased the demand for it.   I don't have to tell you that many people in the US complain about illegal aliens coming here to take their bacon.

Demon Flash Bandit ( Pro Bacon)

Debate Winner

Mom had a few snags in her dialysis.  The Dr. had to replace the tube 4 times.  The others quit working so she had 5 days without dialysis.  I, being the magnanimous dog I am, told her to rest and type my blog when she feels better.  I know this encourages laziness in humans, but sometimes I spoil them because I love them.

The real problem is the doctors they see.  I go to a specialist because a doctor has to specialize to treat dogs because we are special.  Besides, my doctor gives me treats.  My mom's doctor does not!  I know because I smelled her breath, and I have never smelled a milkbone or bacon when she comes home.

I hope you caught my appearance in the presidential debate.  I hate to brag, but I was pawsome.  All the polls said I won.  I got so tired of being interrupted by Trump. Did he learn no manners from his momma dog?   Obviously, my mama dog did a good job teaching me manners because I am a very polite dog.  Some people did not see me on the debate because birds infiltrated the system. I hope this problem will be fixed before the next debate.  I might add that the audience that were able to watch me said I looked very presidential.

Demon Flash Bandit (Debate Winner)

War on Birds

I am pleased to announce that my mom is better so I am back on the campaign trail.  Just as I predicted, my trail has been infiltrated by birds, squirrels, and chipmunks. Of course, they are no match for me. I chased all of the varmints out of my way.

There is one candidate who thinks the United States is no longer a great country.  He is wrong. I say that this is a great country, and that is taking into account that this country has been run by humans.   Just imagine how wonderful this country would be with a dog in charge!

I will assure my fellow citizens that there will be no bird takeover on my watch.  Remember, vote for Demon Flash Bandit!

Demon Flash Bandit (Presidential Candidate)

Mom is Better with Dialysis

I am pleased to write that Mommy is improving.  Thanks for the prayers, the power of the paws, and the good wishes.  Mommy is now on dialysis.  I hope she will be back with Angel and myself as soon as possible.

Meanwhile, I am in charge of the household.   My brothers respect my authority, but Angel Zoom Smokey does not.    If she doesn't get with the program, I am going to report her as a bad dog to Santa Paws. It is tough being in charge.

Demon Flash Bandit (Lead Dog)