Dogs Should Get Oscars!

I have written numerous blogs saying that dogs should get Oscars for many of their performances in movies. It is good to see that the humans are finally beginning to see my wisdom and agree with me. Here is an article that was on the Internet today involving the subject of dogs getting Oscars:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/12/16/oscar-dogs-uggie-from-the-artist_n_1154162.html
It is good to see the humans using some common sense for a change.

I would also like to write about a wonderful product that I got for Christmas from my doggy pal, Raja (who also has a blog about travel, http://www.traveldogbooks.com/?p=565 . That product is Zukes Jerky Naturals. I got the lamb formula, and it has fresh apples, blueberries, and carrots in it. I loved it, and I'm a picky eater! It is also made in the U.S.A., and has no wheat, corn, soy, artificial colors, flavors added fat or by-products. If you are a dog, I am sure you would love this product too. I'm not sure about the humans. They might like it, but why let them try it? It is for dogs, and we don't want to share our treats!

Demon Flash Bandit (Zukes Jerky Naturals: Good Treat)

Light Saber Battle at Toys R Us

Usually all the unusual shopping events happen at Walmart, but sometimes Toys R Us gets to be in the spotlight too. It seems that a customer at a Toys R Us in Oregon (David Canterbury) attacked other shoppers with a lightsaber from Star Wars. I suppose that word must have leaked that Imperial Stormtroopers were planning to shop at that location, and Canterbury had to do something to protect the Rebellion. Chances are the local police won't believe that the "victims" were stormtroopers because they probably did not wear their uniforms so that they would look like normal shoppers. I'm sure that Canterbury probably needs a few months in a nice rubber room where he can contemplate future attacks on the Empire. Let's hope that next time, he doesn't attack until they are wearing their uniforms so the rest of the world won't think he is insane.

Demon Flash Bandit (Reporting a Light Saber Battle)

Birds Shopping at Walmart!

Walmart has had quite a few incidents of problems during holiday shopping, but recently a Utah store had a lot of deaths involved with shopping there. It seems a flock of birds heading for Walmart died on the parking lot. Investigators aren't sure what caused the deaths. Perhaps just the idea of having to shop at Wamart made the birds too depressed to continue living. Personally, I find Walmart to be a depressing store in which to shop. However, since we are dealing with birds here, and I think birds are my enemies, Walmart has finally done something right. Perhaps the birds were armed with pepper spray for the shopping trip and accidentally shot themselves in the face with it--they are birds and birds have those little bird brains. Anyway, it is always nice to read about birds dying....it just makes this dog's day!

Demon Flash Bandit (Birds Shopping at Walmart)

Donald Trump

When I saw a news item with the title, "Donald Trump makes a surprising move", my first thought was that he must have said or did something intelligent. As it turns out, it was one of those teaser type titles because I didn't see anything intelligent about him as usual. I'm still trying to understand why this guy has a television show. It must be for those who want something a little more exciting than "let's watch the grass grow", but a little less exciting than a fishing show. If the show was titled, "Let's go bankrupt", I could understand why he would be perfect for it, but I think it is some kind of stupid, let's get a job show. I'm still trying to understand why the humans want these job things in the first place. They don't seem to enjoy them yet they go to them all the time. I think the humans should have a long talk with their dogs to find out how we can live so well without having to work! I don't know why the humans don't stay home with their dogs and let their cats do the work. It would be good for the cats because most of them are a bit too stuck up if you ask a dog's opinion!





Trump was busy talking about some debate for the GOP (Geezers Offering Policies). I don't know all the details, but I think Big Foot is booked for an appearance as is some of the oldest men in politics--all members of the GOP. For those who want to watch it, I would suggest you make sure you get a good nap beforehand. I'm sure it will put most people to sleep if they are tired.

Demon Flash Bandit (Discussing Donald Trump)

Calling Phantom Fast Snowman: Stunt Dog!

Mommy bought reindeer antlers for my stunt dog, Phantom Fast Snowman. Phantom has to do all the annoying stunts that I don't like to do-like wearing costumes and hats. I say if a dog is supposed to have antlers, we would have been born with them! The humans get such ridiculous ideas! For example, just last night, I was licking my paw. I kept licking it until it was bleeding. I wasn't complaining, but my human saw it, and immediately told me to quit licking it. Then she sprayed some stuff on it to make it taste bad so that I would quit licking it. Do the humans never learn? Of course, I continued licking my paw. No silly flavor is going to stop me from doing something I want to do. I'm not licking it now because I'm not in the mood to lick it, but if I were, you can be sure I would be licking it to my heart's content. I happen to think the humans should sit back and let a dog do what a dog has got to do!

I've got to go now. I suspect there are Christmas gifts hidden around here someplace for me and I need to go and sniff them out. There is really no need to wait until Christmas to enjoy a present!

Demon Flash Bandit (Dog)

Airlines

I don't know about the rest of the dogs out there, but when I learned that Alec Baldwin had been kicked off a plane for using his cell phone, this dog decided that air travel just might be a bit too risky. My humans have never let me fly because they refuse to allow me to be in the cargo area of the plane which is where most bigger dogs like myself would have to fly. However, even if I could fly in a first class seat, how smart is it to fly knowing that the person next to me can get out his cell phone, make a call, and take down the plane. Many decades ago, the airlines wanted their passengers to feel safe in the air, and they went out of the way to make the customer feel that air travel was safe. Now they make you wonder if it is even safe to drive to the airport. I keep reading about the airlines losing money and going bankrupt. I remember when they used to make money and most people liked to fly. Let me explain how things have changed over years.

Fifty years ago, stewardesses were young and pretty. The last time my humans were on a plane, the "flight attendent" looked like she had been with the airline for about 40 years--probably starting when she was 30. The stewardesses used to be pleasant and nice--now the flight attendents (as in Alec Baldwin's case) could play the witch in the movie, Hansel and Gretel from their attitude. They used to give out food--either meals or snacks. Sure, the food wasn't gourmet, but at least it was food. Now most of the airlines charge you for food. They also add charges for luggage that are often not mentioned when the tickets are purchased because they keep changing them all the time. Perhaps if they went back to the old way of doing business-by treating customers like people who are paying for their service, maybe many of them would not be doing so badly. Sometimes a bit of kindness can go a long way. I also think they should start hiring employees who don't let the job of flight attendent put them on a power trip. A flight attendent is basically an "in air waitress"--not the CEO of the airlines. Before I would kick a person off a flight, I would probably assume that the game is not going to bring down the plane, and let it go. It would make for better public relations, and happier customers. I wonder how many customers were annoyed they had to wait for such a stupid reason.

Another thing, in the old days, planes were comfortable, and now they don't have enough leg room for anyone over 4 feet tall. I know they need to save money on gas, but this dog does not want to fly on the volkswagen bug of the airlines. In fact, grabbing a ride on a mosquito would probably give a dog more leg room!

I want to share an American Airlines pilot's opinion with you. It covers this subject well!
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/12/11/alec-baldwin-snl-american-airlines_n_1141626.html

It really was the good old days when it comes to the airlines...now they are all being run by idiots--I'm sure there is not a dog running any of them!

Demon Flash Bandit (Consumer Advocate)

My Hobby: Collecting Bones!

I'm writing this blog later than usual today because I've been a busy dog-you know how it is for us celebrity dogs. Okay, the truth is that I have been laying around napping and I was comfortable and decided that writing the blog could wait. My readers know me so they probably aren't believing that "busy" excuse anyway! Besides, there isn't much of interest for me to write about today. Mommy did eat at Taco Bell and I got to share some cinnamon twist dessert things, and I did find that interesting, but really not up to my usual blog topics. As you know, I like to write about the things that other dogs are afraid to bark anything about. I did see one news item about how napkin rings add a distinctive touch to the table, but I'm a dog, and I could care less about napkin rings unless they are those cool round bones that a dog can get his teeth into! Speaking of bones, I don't want to brag, but I have quite a nice collection. I am always adding to it because some of them slowly disappear--I have no idea how this happens....one minute, you are enjoying a big bone, and a couple of weeks later, it is half its size. My theory is that elves come in the middle of the night and chip away at it when a dog is sleeping. I have yet to stay up all night to test that theory, but it sounds reasonable to me. I wonder if those elves are the ones who wrote the song about all the bones that are connected to each other---you know, the tail bone is connected to the tummy bone, the tummy bone is connected to the liver bone....now hear the bark of the dog. The real problem bone is the funny bone because you never know what it is connected to since it is always moving around trying to be funny which, of course, is how it got the name, funny bone. I must admit that I do enjoy writing about bones. I enjoy chewing them more, but writing comes in second. I hope that my readers are having a nice day and have their own bone collections because everyone needs a hobby!

Demon Flash Bandit (Bone Collector)