Hold the applause--I'm back. On second thought, go ahead and applaud. I love applause. That is how the humans around here got me to be housebroken. They applauded me, and even as a puppy, I loved it!
I have something important to write about today. Mommy bought us some kibble. Angel Zoom
Smokey and myself are used to eating people food so kibble was a whole new experience for us. I took one sniff and decided it was not worthy to be eaten. Angel Zoom Smokey did eat a little of it, but that is only because she is a "foodie" who will eat almost anything. I've watched enough Kitchen Nightmares with Chef Gordon Ramsay to know that a dog does not have to eat just anything that is put in front of his face. I have decided, like Chef Ramsay, to rate this dining experience so that other dogs will know about this food. It was a trial package of Kibbles and Bits Homestyle food. The presentation was acceptable. It was put into a dog bowl. It was a bit insulting that it was in a "dog dish" when I normally eat out of fancy disposable dishes (my humans aren't fond of putting dishes in the dishwasher). However, I could overlook the bowl because it said "Champ", and I am a champion. If you don't believe it, just ask me. The food seemed to be crunchy enough, but I refused to try it because I had eaten chicken already so why would I want to fill up on "dog food"? It isn't like my humans got themselves a big bowl of it. They didn't even take a taste of it. I say if the humans give you food that they don't eat, why should the dog eat it? That is food that should be given to a cat! Angel Zoom Smokey ate it, and said it was okay, but she prefers the human food. That dog will eat anything. I told her she is a disgrace to dogs everywhere, and that is why the humans get by with feeding dogs inferior food. Of course, I tell her she is a disgrace to dogs everyday at least 50 times a day so I suspect she pays little attention to me. I should have sold her on ebay when she was a puppy. I tried, but the humans wouldn't cooperate with me. They love her. Can you believe it? They even paid good money for her instead of buying dingo bones for me. I say you can never go wrong buying dingo bones!
Demon Flash Bandit (Kibble Nightmares)