Knock-Off Toys

Since I am a dog who speaks several human languages and also several different species languages, I have always found language to be a fascinating subject. This is why, when I saw some interesting knock-off toys made in places that don't speak English, I thought it would be a fun site to share with my readers. I know that translation is difficult and I give the knock-offs credit for being good, but the language barrier always makes for some interesting twists. By the way, we dogs aren't spared from getting knock offs. You know your humans are trying to be frugal when instead of a kong toy, you get an ape. Sure, King Kong may have been a giant ape, but it just isn't the same. You know you have the poor parents in the neighborhood if you are the only child playing with Spaderman instead of Spiderman, Super-Bat instead of Superman or Batman, Robert Cop instead of Robo Cop, and if you go home to play with your new video system, Polystation instead of Playstation. If you would like to see some of these knock off toys for yourself, they can be viewed at:
http://www.urlesque.com/2010/06/01/26-hilariously-inaccurate-knock-off-toys/

Mommy has a story about that from her own childhood. It seems that Barbie was introduced in her lifetime (yeah dogs, I think she is about a million years old in dog years). I think she said Barbie was about $1.98. Barbie was made by Mattel so Ideal came up with a different doll named Tammy. Tammy was a little cheaper--I'm not sure how much, but she was cheaper. Mattel's Barbie introduced a little sister, and Tammy had an entire family. I suppose the humans at Ideal must have sat around the board room saying, what do most teenagers want? You know one "genius" in the room said, "I know, they want parents to hang around them all the time. They just can't get enough time spent with the parents." That person went on to head NBC and choose Leno over O'Brian. Barbie got Ken as a boyfriend. I'm not sure if Tammy ever had a boyfriend (like it would be easy with her parents hanging around all the time). My Mommy wanted Tammy to have a boyfriend so my human Grandmother found her "dad" on clearance and suggested she "pretend" that he is Tammy's boyfriend. Strange as it may sound, Mommy grew up unaffected by such scandal, and has actually lived a normal life. This is the same Grandmother who suggested she build a "house" by making a square with "rocks". In fact, I think in some ways, it is good for children to use their imaginations when playing. It also is a great way to keep bored children occupied. Mommy's older sister and her friend, Mike, once spent several hours sitting with a salt shaker because Mommy's dad told them that they could catch a bird if they could put salt on its tail. Sure, they were very young at the time, but I'm sure it gave him at least an hour's peace, and that can be a wonderful thing when you have human puppies. I have a better way of catching a bird. You let a cat catch it, and then you take it from the cat. Yes, Demon Flash Bandit can always be counted on to find the easiest way to do a chore.

Demon Flash Bandit (Knock-off Toys)

Schmitty, The Weather Dog

In my area, when a human wants to find out what the weather report will be, he or she would have to depend on humans to get that information. However, the lucky humans in the New York/Rhode Island area can get that information from Schmitty, the weather dog. Schmitty is a Yorkie whose human, Ron Trotta, is a meterologist. He says that Schmitty telepathically tells him what the weather will be. Finally a human who admits that his job title is dependent on his dog. Most humans will never admit that. I suppose they are afraid if they do, then they will lose their job and their dog will replace them. You have to admit that it is a viable worry for them. All us dogs know that our humans would be lost without us, but finally a human with the courage to admit that fact. This dog wants to say that it is about time a human gave his dog credit where credit is due, and I'm sure Schmitty is happy to have his human help him by interpreting his thoughts. Some of us dogs have learned human, but most dogs don't want to bother learning an inferior language. We prefer dog over all other languages. I do have to tell you that most dogs make the chihuahuas slow down. They start yapping, and they have a problem with speaking dog slow enough for the rest of us. Most of us dogs are much more laid back then chihuahuas. My theory is that because they are so small, they have more to "prove". Anyway, Schmitty, all us dogs are proud of your accomplishments, and I hope to read more stories about humans admitting their dogs' accomplishments on the Internet.

Demon Flash Bandit (Saluting Schmitty, the Weather Dog)